Category: Podcast

I believe KINDNESS is the #1 SKILL we can teach, nurture and celebrate in our youth in order to raise a generation who believes they have the power to create the change we all wish to see in the world. 

In celebration of World Youth Skills Day, today’s podcast episode is extra special because … I didn’t interview anyone! I was the one interviewed by 10-year-old “Kindness Detectives” at SPIRIT Cheer Camp and they asked me some GREAT QUESTIONS. Enjoy!

SHOW NOTES:

Learn more about SPIRIT Cheer Camp

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TRANSCRIPTION:

Hi PARKer. I’m Marly Q and welcome to episode #16, celebrating World Youth Skills Day. In case you’re unfamiliar with this global holiday, like me and most people, the United Nations General Assembly adopted a resolution in 2014, declaring today, July 15th, as World Youth Skills Day to highlight the importance of teaching and developing a skilled youth. I believe that kindness is the number one skill that we can teach, nurture and celebrate in our youth in order to raise a generation who believes that they have the power to create the change we all wish to see in the world. Today’s episode is extra special because I’m not interviewing anyone. In fact, I’m the one that was interviewed by elementary school-aged kids.

That’s right, thanks to an act of random kindness I was invited to speak at Spirit Cheer Camp Virtual Club, a Miami based all-girl camp for ages 5 through 12 years old that focuses on teaching valuable life skills based on weekly themes that promote kindness and empowerment.

Last week’s theme empowered the girls to practice being ”Kindness Detectives”, the girls had top-secret

missions that they had to decode like making a card for someone, doing chores around the house without being asked and they even made special binoculars to help them spot kindness in their homes and community in hopes of teaching the skill of looking for the good in the world.

I want to thank Coach Frances Valladarez for giving me the opportunity to be the spark in their Girl Power Speaker series and spotlighting me as a professional kindness detective. Spirit Cheer Camp’s motto is “It’s not the glitz in the uniform but the spirit that shines within.” I couldn’t agree more. So, let’s sit back, relax and get ready to receive a spark of kindness from our youth today. Let’s listen.

[02:07] Coach Frances: There you go. Hi, Marly.

[02:09] Marly Q: Hi.

[02:11] Coach Frances: Hi, Marly. How are you doing?

[02:13] Marly Q: I am so excited and happy to be here. Nice to meet you. Hello ladies.

[02:20] Coach Frances: Wave girls. So, ladies, Marly Q is a philanthropist who believes that kindness is your superpower, right? We talked a little bit about it earlier, we saw part of her TED Talk. She inspires people of all ages to PARK. What did we say PARK was, right girls? It was Perform Acts of Random Kindness.

[02:45] Marly Q: Oh, I love it!

[02:47] Coach Frances: So, she is here to encourage us all to go ahead and to be the spark and to PARK. So, Marly Q, the floor is all yours for a little bit here.

[02:57] Marly Q: Oh, my goodness. Well, thank you so much, Francis, and beautiful ladies, I have you all on gallery view so that I can see you. What a beautiful thing to be grateful for, technology, that we can all be communicating. So, I am taking just a moment to look at each of your beautiful faces and give you each a smile and a hello. Oh, I love it! Because you are all, what I believe to be kindness superheroes. I am so grateful to have been invited today to join you through an act of random kindness. A friend just sent a text and said, “Hey, you would be really great to come and speak at the Spirit Cheer Camp for our Girl Power series.”. And I’m like, “What?”, “And they’re talking about kindness and they’re kindness detectives.”. And I’m like, “Well, these are my kind of people.”, what I call PARKers.

PARKers are people who Perform Acts of Random Kindness, and I truly believe that those are the superheroes that are out to change the world and make an impact. So, I’m honored to meet you all!

[03:54] Coach Frances: Awesome. Okay, so some of our girls have a couple of questions for you. Girls, we’re going to go ahead and get started with Sienna.

[04:00] Sienna: Hi.

[04:01] Marly Q: Hi Sienna.

[04:02] Sienna: So, I have a question. The question is, how old were you when you decided to make a difference by Performing Acts of Random Kindness?

[04:09] Marly Q: Well, how old are you Sienna?

[04:11] Sienna: I’m 10 years old.

[04:12] Marly Q: I was your age; I was 10 years old when I first discovered that I had this superpower within me to change the world. And at 10 years old, I had a beautiful teacher who told me and helped me discover that acts of kindness really make an impact and have the power to change the world. So, from the moment I was 10 years old and forward, throughout my entire life, I have been practicing being a PARKer and performing acts of kindness.

[04:43] Coach Frances: Awesome. Lily, do you have a question for Marly?

[04:47] Lily: Was the field trip story real?

[04:49] Marly Q: Absolutely! Yes, Lily. It’s very real and I remember it honestly, like it was yesterday and I have been telling that story for years and I had the opportunity two years ago to share it on stage at a TEDx event, which is kind of this worldwide platform to share ideas that are worth spreading, and I got to share it for the first time. The field trip story is absolutely true.

[05:16] Coach Frances: That was her question. I said, “Wait a second. That’s a great question for Marly. I’m sure it was, but let’s have her tell you.”. Okay. Next up, we have Alexa.

[05:24] Alexa: Hi!

[05:25] Marly Q: Hi Alexa.

[05:27] Alexa: I have a question. Is there anyone who didn’t want to participate in random acts of kindness and is there a way I could be a superhero too?

[05:35] Marly Q: That’s a great two-part question. I’m going to answer the second part first. Absolutely! I think you already are a kindness superhero, just by being part of this group, by making the time right now to be kind, to tap into your courage and ask me a question like that; I think that that already makes you a superhero. So, all you need to do to be a superhero for the rest of your life is actually practice, not just spying kindness, right? Looking for kindness in the world and others, but being the spark, being the one to perform that act of kindness. So, the answer to that second part of your question is absolutely, that’s what you can do to be a kind of superhero. And the first part of your question is also interesting, I love that. Have I ever had someone who didn’t want to perform acts of kindness? Was that the question?

[06:27] Alexa: Yeah.

[06:28] Marly Q: So, yes, absolutely. You will find in life, sometimes in school, out at the park, at the grocery store, in traffic, in work, when you get to that stage, you will find people that are maybe not willing to, not just perform acts of kindness, but they’re not willing to receive your kindness. So, what I’ve learned is to allow that to be okay. Not everybody has the practice that I have and that you all ladies are working on having, the habit of performing acts of kindness and sometimes for some people, if you don’t have that practice of being kind to others, being kind to yourself, sometimes that’s really difficult to receive kindness from other people. So, I’ve learned to not make that wrong, but rather to just accept it and continue being the spark, right? Because it’s about YOU being the superhero. And I have found that even when other people don’t want to accept my kindness, or are kind of like, “No, I don’t want your hug or I don’t want your high five or I don’t want your compliment.”, for example, if I just continue showing up with kindness and understanding and not making them wrong, sooner or later, they’ll become a PARKer too.

[07:38] Coach Frances: Love it. That’s a wonderful lesson, girls. We’re all unique, we’re all different and it’s nice to also acknowledge that somebody else may not be feeling that way that day, but it’s okay, you continue to be kind. So, next up we have Kate.

[07:52] Kate: My question is, do you like your job so much that you would stay in it forever?

[08:00] Marly Q: Forever and ever more, 1, 2, 3, 4. I would Kate, thank you for that question. I think that I am very blessed and fortunate and grateful to have found my “job”, if you will, when I was your age because I really do see it as a calling, I see it as a passion and something that I, I didn’t know it could be a job. You know, you don’t see that, you know, advertised, “Hey, apply here to be a kindness superhero.”, but I created that job for myself. As a speaker, I decided to become a speaker to share kind of stories, I have my own podcast, which I’d love to feature you ladies on, it’s called Time to be Kind with Marly Q, if you all are open to it, give me a thumbs up. I’m happy to feature you on my podcast. Yes, thumbs up! Because, I made it my job as a speaker, as a teacher and as somebody that creates events to bring people together. I made it my job and I intend to do it forever and ever and ever Kate. Thank you for asking.

[09:02] Coach Frances: Girls, you know how I talk to you about your inner spirit and that inner little light that shines within you that only shines within you because that’s your unique light? Well, that’s what she did, Marly went ahead and used that unique light to make something special for her life, for her job like Kate called it and also to make a difference in the world. So, next up, we have Lucy.

[09:21] Marly Q: Hi Lucy.

[09:22] Lucy: My question is, is it difficult to perform random acts of kindness, if every day the world gets a little harder to do a random act of kindness?

[09:32] Marly Q: Well, what a question! So, I think that that’s a very deep question, and are you also 10 years old Lucy?

[09:39] Lucy: Yes.

[09:41] Marly Q: Wow. So, I think that’s a deep question for a 10-year-old, and I appreciate you asking me that because it is very easy to believe that the world is a difficult and a hard place and that there’s darkness and, you know, it’s hard to be kind when sometimes, a lot that you see is the opposite of kindness, right? We see a lot of unkindness and a lot of violence and a lot of things that make us feel sad and like, “Hey, like, how can I be a superhero and perform acts of kindness when it doesn’t seem that everybody else is on board?”, right? And it doesn’t seem that it’s cool to be kind, and what I would say to that is, what are you focusing on?

Your life and your reality, and how you feel about yourself and your family and your friends and the world that you live in, is determined by what you focus on.

What you focus on is what you feel and you make your decisions based on what you think and what you believe, and how you feel about the world. So, even though it is true that there is a lot of unkindness in the world, it is equally true, if not more true, in my opinion, that there is a tsunami of kindness out there.

There’s kindness all the time if you’re looking for it, if you believe that kindness is stronger than unkindness, and if you commit to being someone that’s always going to look for the kindness and other people, that’s what I would say to that is, just be really careful about what you focus on. Because it is very easy to just focus on the bad or the problems, or how hard it can be, and it’s just as equally challenging to continue the practice and the habit, which is what you’re doing right now, of creating this practice of always looking for the helpers, looking for the kind people, being that spark of kindness because the world is always going to need it.

We’re never going to live in a world where everybody is always hugging and high fiving and loving on each other all the time, there’s always going to be that “dark side”, or that challenging part of life, it’s always there. And at the same exact time, you have the power to be the spark of kindness and bring that light to the world. So, is it hard? Sometimes, but you can do it.

[12:06] Coach Frances: I love that you used the word light, that’s exactly what I was going to say, girls, focus on the light, all of your attention, all of your energy needs to go into that light. There’s going to be that darkness, of course, but focus, because if you look for it, there’s always kind people, there’s always nice things happening, there’s always good in it, and that’s what we need to focus on. Marly Q, we’re so happy that you were able to join us and take some time off. So, if you could go ahead and have a couple of words for the girls, I’m going to go ahead and record you to put it on Instagram. So, you will– your legacy will stay with Spirit Cheer.

[12:37] Marly Q: Great. I love that. You know, making this time to be kind with each of you ladies is to me, the spark of my day. What a beautiful way to start this day, just believing in kindness and being able to witness you young ladies and kindness superheroes in the making. As you are undertaking your kindness challenge and being spies for kindness, that brings me a lot of hope, because I think that’s what we need to be, people that are actively looking, detectives, looking for kindness in everyday life, the more we look for it, the more we see it, and the more we see it, the more we believe in it; and the more that we can act from that place, and really be the spark of kindness that we wish to see in the world.

I’m so grateful to have been invited to be part of your Girl Power series, I really hope to stay connected with you all, you can totally reach out to me and please listen to the podcast, leave a review, comment on any posts that you see me put out because, like you all said, this is my job! My job is to celebrate kindness and bring that light into the world and I’d love to do that to each and every single one of you. Thank you.

[13:47] Coach Frances: Beautiful. Girls, so, I want you all to unmute yourselves now please, and let’s go ahead and give her a big round of applause, thank Marly for being here.

[13:58] Outro: I absolutely loved making time to be kind with all the girls at Spirit Cheer Camp and I hope you enjoyed this special interview as much as I did. I told you today’s episode was extra special because we’re celebrating World Youth Skills Day and I’m also celebrating two other big things while we’re on the topic of teaching valuable life skills.

First, my family and I are celebrating our son’s birthday, Jude Parker turns two years old today. And yes, we named him PARKer because if it’s one skill that we’re teaching him is how to be someone who Performs Acts of Random Kindness for himself, others and the world.

We’re also celebrating the official launch of my new online course called the B.E.S.T. Way to Stress Less™. It goes without saying that COVID-19 has caused a lot of stress for our youth and adults alike worldwide. And so, I’ve made a lot of time to be kind during quarantine in order to create a simple and practical online course that you can complete in under an hour.

I created the B.E.S.T. Way to Stress Less™. in order to teach you my proven four step method for feeling your best and living with less stress, even if you think you’re too busy with no extra time, money or energy to complete another online course.

This course is for you whether you’re young, in age or young at heart, brand new to self-care, or if you have an established practice. The fact is that we’re all experiencing stress and I know that I can help you stress less.

I have a special discount code for members of my Kind Qrew. So, if you haven’t joined yet, now is the time. It’s free and quick to join. So, for direct links to join my Kind Qrew, and to gain access to the B.E.S.T. Way to Stress Less™, plus this episode’s show notes and transcription, visit MarlyQ.com/16. That’s Marlyq.com/16 for this episode number.

[15:47] Thank you for listening. If you’re inspired to make a little more time to be kind, please subscribe, leave a kind review and share with a friend who would appreciate this podcast too. Thank you for being the spark of kindness. See you next time! [15:59]

I believe that one of the most understated forms of power we have is our ability to plant seeds of kindness; at home, at work, in our community and in the world. 

Today we shine the light on Marlon Hill, a long time PARKner who talks about the importance of Performing Acts of Random Kindness and …

• Building community⁣ & a support system⁣
• Being civically engaged in local politics⁣
• Believing in your power to create impact⁣
• Making the time to be kind & VOTE

SHOW NOTES:

Connect & Learn More at MarlonHill.com,Twitter: @MarlonAHill, Instagram: @MarlonHill, Facebook: @MarlonHillforD9 and hashtags #MarlonforD9 #ItsaNewDay.

You can reach Marlon directly on his cell at 305-244-4456 or email at marlon@marlonhill.com

You can support Marlon Hill’s campaign in the following ways:

1. DONATE to the campaign   2. VOLUNTEER any time through phone banking and other safe engagement activities –  3.  VOTE – recommending that voters choose the safer and convenient method of voting by mail.  You must register to vote (update your address or signature by July 20 and request your vote by mail ballot by August 8 at miamidade.gov/elections or call 305-499-VOTE (8683).

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hi PARKer I’m Marly Q and welcome to episode number 15 with Marlon Hill. Our special guest today is a long time PARKner who’s passionate about Performing Acts of Random Kindness (PARK) and leveraging the power of music, arts and culture. Marlon Hill is a Miami business attorney with the law firm of Hamilton, Miller and Birthisel, LLP. He has served as the vice chair of the Board of Trustees of the Miami Foundation, a board member of the Miami Parking Authority and advisory board member of the Miami Book Fair International and even PARK Project, our own non-profit, among many other community leadership roles. Continuing his legacy of service, Marlon Hill is presently a candidate for the Miami Dade County Commission District 9 representing the residents of Southwest Miami Dade County. And as we near election day here in the US on August 18, I invited Marlon today to talk about one of the most understated forms of power we have. Let’s listen and learn. Welcome to the show Marlon Hill.

[01:15] Marlon: Thank you so much. Thank you for making me the Chief Operating Officer of Awesomeness.

[01:20] Marly Q: Yes, I like that.

[01:21] Marlon: Chief Awesomeness Officer, CAO.

[01:24] Marly Q: There you go. You know how much I like acronyms so don’t even get me started there! Our journey began almost a decade ago, can you believe it? We have been PARKners, in awesome crime, spreading kindness for almost a decade. And I will never forget meeting you, kind of in an informal way at an Action Coach business planning seminar. I was just getting started with my business and you with your law firm, and I got to share a little bit about my non-profit and my mission to spread kindness and you approached me right after that, and you’re like, “Hey, I’m a lawyer and is your non-profit incorporated? Do you need some business advice? I’m happy to help.”. And you gave me your card, I’m like, “Wow, I don’t even know that I have a kind awyer in my rolodex, so to speak”.

[02:14] Marlon: We do exist.

[02:15] Marly Q: Yeah, thank you. And from that day forward, I mean, not only did you help us incorporate PARK Project, our non-profit, you helped us apply for our 501c3 and get that approved, later on our registered trademarks for our foundation and our 5K PARK Fest and you’ve just made so much time to be kind to me, to my husband, to our movement and our cause but I’m just so grateful to you, always.

[02:44] Marlon: You know that day when we met, your spirit was just so transcending, you were PARKing your spirit in the room, and it was infectious and inspiring to me and I know that we share similar values with giving back, you know, and I believe– we both believe, you know, Marly in so much of creating a support system for each other and that’s what it means to be kind and taking time to be kind or taking time to PARK yourself into the space, into spaces where you know, you will not even find yourself right? You know, with the pandemics happening all across the world, pandemics of public health, pandemics of social unrest, and pandemics– all different– pandemics of economic instability, all these things, create room– creates a room for kindness, for us to kind of fill a void for each other. And I’ve always thought, you know, I grew up in a Catholic Church, going to a Jesuit High School in Jamaica, and then when I first came here as an immigrant kid, you know, the Catholic Church taught me so much about servant leadership, and really loving your neighbor and being kind and doing Christ like things. I don’t want to necessarily, you know, mean to PARK Christianity into this space but just in terms of general spirituality, it’s important for us to see each other, see each other’s humanity and to uphold the dignity that each person deserves and that can only happen through kindness.

[04:24] Marly Q: Absolutely. You’re absolutely right. And through everything that we’ve been experiencing, I mean, throughout 2020, like you said, health, financial, social pandemics and unrest, and just so much stress and challenges and these dark times gives birth to a lot of kindness from a lot of people, if we’re looking for it. And I think the first place to look for it is within ourselves, right? How can I PARK? How can we be there for each other and connect in such a way, and for me, I follow you on Instagram and I follow the great work that you do, you’ve been making so much time to PARK and time to be kind for the community. You live in South Miami Dade County, and you’ve been, you know, helping and volunteering with food distribution and literally going to people’s, you know, homes, knocking on their doors and seeing how can we be of service to each other during this time and I just find that so inspiring and such a great example of true servant leadership.

[05:26] Marlon: Every person, irrespective of their stage in life, what they do for a living, I truly believe in the power of one person to PARK, one person to be kind, that one spontaneous random act that’s consistently done, whether it’s spontaneously or deliberately. I really believe that, you know, the power of the trickle effect of that act of kindness and it doesn’t necessarily mean that it happens in a non-profit charitable manner; it could happen in business, it could happen in a place of faith, it could happen where people are in recreational and sporting activities. You know, life happens in its normal flow of things. It’s important for us to just be cognizant to the fact that life and history is going to take you in different places and you just have to be ready to kind of like, passing on that love and kindness to people that you know, people that you don’t know. And being someone who’s a practicing attorney, and now I’m a political candidate for higher office, kindness can happen in politics, kindness can happen in business, kindness can happen, even in social settings, but it’s creating that environment around you, when you are expecting that same type of love that you give, right? And it’s small things and it could be something that’s even transformational.

You know, when we were thinking, you know, the small farmers can’t sell their produce, hotels and the restaurants are closed, why don’t we raise the money to buy their produce, and then to give that produce to families that need it? And let’s call it Adopt a Box. So, each box of produce cost $25. So, you’d PARK $25, you’d buy the produce from the farmers, and then you give it to seniors, veterans and families that need it; that’s what it means kind of like create a cycle, a circle of PARK, PARKnering, right? That’s– you give to receive, and it comes back in different ways and I think that can happen in so many different forms.

[07:49] Marly Q: Absolutely. And looking for that opportunity, not only for you yourself to PARK but how can I encourage other people to, I would call it “PARKticipate” in this ripple effect of kindness and making it easy. Because so many people, I have found, through the more than a decade of doing this civic engagement and volunteer, mobilizing work through events is, so many people want to PARK, so many people want to make time to be kind, they just don’t know how. And there’s so many challenges and there’s so many problems, and there’s so many great causes that we can help, but where do you start? And it all feels so overwhelming. So, when you have leaders such as yourself who say, who take the time to think about how can we help those farmers and you come up with a plan, what I would call, a PARK Project, and reach out to other people and say, “Hey, PARKticipate in this PARK Project, you can give back and make time to be kind in this way. Look how easy it can be.”, right? And sometimes it’s with money but many times, it’s with your time. Many times, it’s with your other resources, maybe with a certain set of knowledge or skills that you have that you can pay forward and give to others.

[09:00] Marlon: Right. And it doesn’t have to be, you don’t have to start your own nonprofit foundation, or start a 10,000 people marathon race, it doesn’t have to be a big Food Festival in a big city. It could just be a group of family members, neighbors, your PARK Project.

You know, for example, I am planning a PARK Project in the community that I grew up in, South Miami Heights, in July, we are going to just gather members of the community and go and pick up the trash on the main streets on the right away, right? Because you must feel good about the place that you live, you know, in order to give kindness and to give love, you have to create an environment where that love and kindness can be nurtured. And it’s not just– it’s aesthetically, it’s a mindset, your mental health, it’s the environment that you are in, to create that space where love and kindness can just really flourish, where families don’t feel that they’re in their own bubble of distress and stress and challenges, but they know that they have a community that is enveloped with compassion and empathy and love and kindness that if something happens, like a hurricane, God forbid, or another pandemic, then I can go across the street and often you go, “Hey, Marly, how are you? You know, do you have brown sugar for my brownies?”, and I’m just using that metaphorically, right? But rarely, in growing up in the Caribbean, everyone on the block in the neighborhood, they know each other, they’re interacting, they’re sharing. They are– the lady down the street can discipline me just as much as my mom, right? But unfortunately, we are not cultivating that type of village, you know, “PARK villages” can have that type of love and kindness that is consistently exchanged between our neighbors and I think we really need to kind of work on that deliberately. Love and kindness is not something that you just, kind of just happen on to, it really takes a deliberate, intentional and purposeful, and it could be spontaneous act, but you must kind of, you have to spark it.

[11:21] Marly Q: And plant that seed, all I hear is you’re planting that seed of kindness in fertile soil, and making sure that soil can nurture that seed, and that it’s being watered regularly, and you talk kindly to the plants so that it grows. And I think that there’s just so much distrust and disconnection from, you know, local citizens and their local governments, let alone national government, that I really admire how you’re running your campaign, and I haven’t, you’re the first, you know, kind of political conversation that, or political candidate that I’ve ever had on the show, and it really wasn’t without intention at all, whether you were running for, you know, Commissioner of District nine or not, I just really honor and admire and respect and value and appreciate your style of leadership because it is inclusive. It is about engaging other people, it is about facilitating conversation and kindness and trust within your neighbors.

[12:26] Marlon: And I really appreciate that, you know, Marly, because, you know, I really see me running to be a Commissioner, not so much about the title and the leadership opportunity, because it’s really just an extension of who I am and what I have been doing, right? And it’s very important for folks to understand that you really shouldn’t be afraid of politics, right? It’s not about getting into an argument over an issue or a topic that you may have a difference of opinion of, right? Because we all have different perspectives. But the truth of the matter is that, you are going to need government and government is going to need you in order to deliver certain services on to a community, in order for there to be some level of order and quality of life for people to prosper, and to be more loving and kind, right? Because if you have a community that is distressed or stressed economically, or conflict within family, or a community that looks grungy and dirty, that’s not creating an environment of love and kindness. And we drive by communities all the time because our communities are not developed equally. Some communities have more nice-looking trees than others, some communities have more community violence than others, some communities have more folks who are in economic distress than others. And it’s not about the type of government, if it’s the type of community that we want, do we want happiness and love and more kindness to be spread? Is the answer to that question yes or no?

And if the answer that question is YES, you want the same level of love, kindness and happiness for your community, then you have to start asking you the question, well, who is your community? Right, and am I welcome in your community? And, what do you expect me to bring to your community? Do you expect me to bring anger and rage and, and discontent? Or do you expect love and kindness and happiness in order to make your community better, right? And when we live in a multicultural community like this, we all have different perspectives on the quality of life that we want and what I’m really saying is that, we can’t afford to be– to marginalize each other or to exclude each other– the same love and kindness that we’re going to give to each other’s humanity, we may have to work hard or harder in order to spread those random acts of kindness.

[15:12] Marly Q: Absolutely. One of the things that I love about your specific campaign is your slogan, I love, “It’s a New Day”. It’s a New Day inspires hope, you know, I approach every day with that mindset, you know, it’s a new day, how can I be of service today? What impact can I make today? And I think that if we instilled that philosophy, those values in our children, then we would be planting that seed and nurturing that soil and growing and watching our youth blossom into our future leaders, which is people that want to run for government for the right reasons, for the servant leadership opportunity, and we can start to create that kind of relationship between community and government that is necessary in order to, not just improve our quality of our communities, but our quality of life or quality of education, our quality of resources that we are giving and receiving to each other. And I know that that’s one of the things that you focus on is youth mentorship quite a bit, right?

[16:16] Marlon: Absolutely. We, you know, you mentioned the whole idea of planting a seed, in South Dade, we have one of the largest agricultural industries in the entire state and farmers will tell you, you can’t have a harvest without planting a seed, right? And if the soil is fertile, and we get enough rain, and it’s ready to go, let’s just plant the right seed because at some point, there’s going to be a harvest, a bountiful harvest of your favorite tropical fru

it that could be in the form of love and kindness, right? If you are not tilling the soil, getting it ready, if you are not caring for it over the time of growth, you won’t get the type of harvest that you want, right? And I firmly believe that what I’m actually doing as a candidate, and as a county commissioner who can’t serve more than eight years now that there are term limits, right? Is that I’m planting seeds that are going to be reaped way after I’m gone, right?

And that could be that young person who is in high school now where12 years from now, he or she decides to come back home from school and wants a leadership opportunity, it could be elective office, it could be serving on a board and it could be just their family PARK Project.

But we must create an environment where every person , Marly, empowered that their PARK Project, no matter how small it is, and it’s not a matter of size, it’s a matter of impact, right?

You have to believe in that personal impact, in that personal power and I’ve always tried to reach my– helping all the young people you know, and the reason why we met that other day is that, as a business lawyer, I believe in helping entrepreneurs, social entrepreneurs or other entrepreneurs, small business owners, to plant their seeds, as part of my part of my farm, and my practice is to watch that harvest at a later date. So, the planting the seed of the trademark, planting the seed of the tax exempt status, planting the seed of incorporation, planting the seed of the public private partnerships that could exist, is an act that could be an harvest, for magnifying what PARK does as a mission, and every person and organization I believe Marly, you have the ability to do that in a community like ours.

You know, so, this election that’s coming up on on August 18th is an opportunity for the citizens and residents to, the residents of Miami Dade County to really evaluate the leaders that they’re going to choose for mayor and county commissioner and judges and state– you know, are these the type of persons that are in sync with my values, that understand my interests, that exhibit a certain level of compassion and empathy for a world of love and kindness that I want to see, right? And if we are in sync with that, then you would go and vote for that person. And voting is also an act of kindness.

[19:23] Marly Q: Yes, I wanted you to touch on that, please, let’s encourage people, why should they make the time to be kind and vote?

[19:30] Marlon:

Voting is one of the most understated forms of personal power, that you are giving your interests, your values, your passions to the feet of a person who has that power that you have given them to make decisions on the things that you care about.

So, if you want to live in a community that is comprised of or sparked with certain things that, you want more public parks, or you want more support for after school programs for kids, or you want a more trusting meaningful relationship with your police officers, or you want better customer service when you go to your public health facilities, these are all things that your government can actually impact. So, these are policies and ideas that you will be giving the power to a county commissioner, or city commissioner to decide, right? And it’s not just a law, or it’s not just money in a budget, it’s actually ideas of things you want to see. So, you’re giving your vote of your values of love and kindness that will be translated into the services that are delivered to you and your neighbors and your community through government in partnership with you, and that’s why your vote is so critical in order to make those things happen, because you don’t want the type of leadership that is going to be pursuing policies and laws or the allocation of monies in a budget that are counter to the type of quality of life that you want, and the quality of life that you need for your families, right? So, this is the reason why you can’t afford to just discount the fact, well, in the last August 18th election, the turnout was only about 18% Marly and that’s unconscionable, right? Because that means over 82% of people decided not to have an impact of creating a community that’s filled with resources and ideas and PARK Projects that could improve the lives of people.

[21:50] Marly Q: Yeah, that’s crazy. I think– I’m so glad that you’re sharing this because I think that most people maybe didn’t just, you know, dismiss the opportunity to vote, maybe they just don’t value, or see the value in their right and their power to vote. I think that this is a very important conversation and we have listeners, not just here from Florida and from Miami Dade County, but from all over the nation and even the world now, we have some international listeners as well as we’re getting this podcast started, and just wherever you are, it’s so important to be, to get educated, not just on the issues that matter to you and be clear on your values and what’s important to you and what you want in your community, but actually make the time to be kind and do your research on the candidates and their values and their platforms and go out there and vote and I think that now with the pandemic and COVID, I hope that that doesn’t reduce our voter turnout.

[22:46] Marlon: We have vote by mail, you can vote through mail. So, vote by mail is a very important option, you can do it safely, you can track your vote by mail, like an express mail package to make sure that it’s actually received and processed, right? You can vote early, which is two weeks before August 18, right? So, wherever you are voting, your vote is really an important statement of you standing in your space and saying, “My voice matters and I want to ensure, collectively with all the voices, that I have my say on where I would like to see the community, the direction and the community go.”, right? Why would you give that up and not have a say? It’s just like being, starting your own PARK project, right? You’re making a decision to stand in your truth and to spark PARKticipation, right?

You are standing in your truth and no matter how you view your project, whatever your random act is, that spark is similar like a vote, right? And then when it has a ripple effect Marly, it’s like a tsunami, after that goes out, right? You know, once you have that random act, voting is just like that, right? So, just think about it like your group of friends and your family. Just, start small and have a conversation about, “Okay guys, you know, I live in Doral or I live in South Dade. You know, or I live in Atlanta, or I live in Bogota, and I want to see this change, right. Just, I want to see this change.”. And then you say, “Okay, what are you going to do to see the change you want? What are you willing to do? Are you willing to start a PARK project? Are you willing to start an advocacy group? Are you willing to have a letter writing campaign to the elected leaders? Are you willing to raise money for a particular issue?”. There are number of things you can do to see the change you want, but it’s not just going to happen just by you wishing it to happen. You must have– you can’t be expected, or you have to step in– when you PARK, again, it’s purposeful.

[25:00] Marly Q: Yeah, it’s action statement, it is very purposeful.

[25:02] Marlon: It’s an action statement. And voting is an action statement, right? And you know, so the deadline to register the vote is July 17th here in Miami Dade County, right? You have to be 18 years old, and a US citizen, you get your voter registration card, you can request your vote by mail online, you can request by phone or fax, the ballot comes to your home, and you do your research, you fill out the ballot, you put it in the sleeve, and you seal it, and you ensure that you sign the envelope and you drop it in the mail, the postage is already paid for, it’s free. You go online, and then you check to see when it’s received and processed and then that your vote is counted. And then, you’ll see on August 18th whether or not the persons that you supported, by yourself or you do it as a group, because each candidate needs as many votes to win, right? So, I need 50% plus one votes to win in my election in district nine, because only if you live in district nine, can you vote for me, but everyone votes for the mayor. And wherever you live in the world or wherever you live in the state, you have to do your homework as a citizen to understand what is the extent of your power and who are your choices, this is very important for you to really have the support you need for your PARK Projects.

[26:27] Marly Q: Absolutely. Where are you placing your trust and your values? Who are you passing that on to help create that ripple effect that you want in your community? Thank you so much for walking us through that process and educating all of us listening. I will make sure to include links in the show notes to help people register to vote and do their research and include the link to your awesome campaign page as well, that has so many resources for people to benefit from.

[26:55] Marlon: And if anyone wants to PARK anything with me, whether as a small business idea or a social entrepreneurship idea or even something related to the community or politics, you know, feel free to give me a call myself, the 305-244-4456. We’re creating a community of support, we’re creating a community of resilience and whether we do that through politics or whether we do that as just PARKners, I think that’s, at the end of the day, that’s what it’s really all about.

[27:26] Marly Q: Absolutely. I hope that you are just proud of the seed that you planted almost 10 years ago and how it’s evolved into this podcast and what we’re doing now. Thank you for offering your cell phone number.

[27:42] Marlon: Extremely proud. No, no, thank you so much.

[27:44] Marly Q: Yeah. And just always being there, always being a PARKner. So, thank you so much for offering that to so many people. We appreciate you.

[27:52] Marlon: Thank you so much and have a blessed summer.

[27:55] Marly Q: Thank you, likewise.

[27:57] Outro: I’m so grateful to have had the opportunity to shine the light on a great example of servant leadership and the power of planting seeds of kindness in your life, at home, at work and in your community and the world. To connect with Marlon Hill, learn more about supporting his campaign and registering to vote in the upcoming elections, visit malrlyq.com/15.

[28:21] Thank you for listening. If you’re inspired to make a little more time to be kind, please subscribe, leave a kind review and share with a friend who’d appreciate this podcast too. Thank you for being the spark of kindness. See you next time! [28:32]

What if the world runs out of money?

Could you imagine how vastly different our world would be if we all learned to value the currency of kindness more than the currency of money?  

We believe creating this kind of world is possible, that’s why this podcast exists.

Our vision is to live in a World where Everyone Performs Acts of Random Kindness. #wePARK

SHOW NOTES:

Click here to get your FREE downloadable copy of the book “What if the World Runs Out of Money” in exchange for an honorary pledge to PARK (Perform Acts of Random Kindness).

Click here to LISTEN to “What if the World Runs Out of Money?” 5 minute storytelling video

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hi PARKer, I’m Marly Q and welcome to Episode 14 with Murray Jones. Joining us today all the way from Brisbane, Queensland. Murray Jones is a successful Australian businessman and self-published author who has written a rhyming illustrated book for kids called, “What if the World runs out of Money?”. This book is meant to resonate with eight-year olds to 80-year olds because it’s all about valuing the important things in life, or what I like to call the currency of kindness more than the currency of money. Not only did Murray make this time to be kind and write the book, he made it available for free in exchange for making an honorary pledge to do something kind for someone. And he even donated a signed hard copy of the book to give away to one of you listening. That makes Murray our first Aussie PARKer and superhero in our book. So, let’s listen and welcome him into our Kind Qrew.

So, welcome to the show, thank you so much for making the time to be kind my new friend and PARKer all the way from Brisbane, Queensland, Australia. Murray, welcome to the show.

[01:21] Murray: Thanks Marly, how you doing?

[01:24] Marly Q: I’m so excited that you found me through the beautiful internet and my TED Talk, Kindness is your Superpower, and you took the initiative to look at my website and reach out to me and connect and I’m just so grateful because we have a very aligned mission and aligned cause and this book that you wrote, “What if the World Runs out of Money?”, I know you sent me and one of our PARKers listening a copy; I can’t wait to receive it and give it out. So, please tell me the story, what is this book about and how did you get inspired to write it?

[02:01] Murray: Yeah, thanks, Marly. The inspiration came from my youngest daughter, actually, we were sitting watching the news or the bad news, the usual bad news and this is a few years ago, actually, and then she, asked me, you know, “Dad, what if the world runs out of money?”. So, that’s really, you know, where it started and I’ve always loved writing so I wrote a book, and it’s a simple rhyming book about the– well, you know, the hypothetical question, you know, what if the world runs out of money? It seems eerily you know, it’s a bit weird at the moment, in the weird world we’re in at the moment with so much stress around money and you know, etc. But yeah, that was the inspiration for the book, Marly.

[02:54] Marly Q: What I find interesting is that it’s not just a book, right? With this hypothetical question, but you also have set up a website, right? So, tell us about that.

[03:04] Murray: Yeah. So, I’ve set up a website called worldwithoutmoney.com.au. And the idea there is that people go on to that site, and they make a pledge to do something kind for someone and it then automatically, obviously they enter their email address, etc. and then it’s an honorary pledge, no one sort of checks to make sure that, you know, they’re doing it, but obviously, and then it automatically reverts back with, you know, with a thank you note and a PDF and a flip book so, a soft copy of the book for free.

[03:40] Marly Q: I think that’s so awesome. And how many honorary pledges would you say you’ve been able to gather?

[03:47] Murray: You know, thousands, there are a lot. So, and most of them are with all the simple things, you know, I’ll help a neighbor, I’ll cook for the neighbor, I’ll go and see the old lady down the street, I’ll, you know, one young girl, I remember there was the earthquake in Peru she said, “I’m going to donate my, you know, my pocket money for the year to the you know to the earthquake, you know fund.”. One lady– so, there are a lot of simple pledges but there was one that came straight from a lady who owned some land in the Philippines, 10,000 square meters of land and she donated that to the local community.

[04:30] Marly Q: Wow.

[04:30] Murray: And last time I heard that they’re raising money to build a school there, so, yeah, it did resonate and setting up that website was very much you know, I never wrote the book to, you know, to make money out of it. I just, you know, wrote it and then I got about 100 hard copies, so…

[04:49] Marly Q: I feel so honored to be receiving one and one of our Kind Qrew listeners receiving one too. Because really what sparked interest, you know, in me when you reached out, not just the title of the book is certainly, you know, a good headline, especially in these times, like you said, but really I talk a lot about the currency of kindness, as much or more than we value the currency of money; what a different world we’d live in. So, the pledges that people are making on your website, whether they’re small, smiling at strangers, I mean, I’m sure, you know, there’s a lot of small acts of kindness and big ones, like some of the ones that you shared, I think that what makes the currency of kindness so powerful, and what makes it a superpower is that it’s limitless. It is abundant, and it’s available to everyone, ages, you know, toddler to 100 and just like your book is targeted to a wide demographic and wide age so is kindness is available, and it will never run out.

[05:54] Murray: It will never run out and it is amazing and like, for such a simple act of kindness can do too in someone else’s life, it’s amazing, really. You know, often, you’re far more powerful than giving something of monetary value, you know, as you say, you know, and it can be as simple as, you know, a smile to a stranger, you know, it’s a pretty tough world out there at the moment and it should be more of it. So, I suppose this is my small contribution to try and generate some more kindness in the world.

[06:22] Marly Q: Well, I thank you. I, you know, created this podcast to spotlight and shine the light on PARKers, on people who perform acts of random kindness all over the world in small and in big ways, because it all makes a huge difference, and my friend writing a book and putting together a website, there’s nothing small about that. I can tell you from experience, that is a great big effort, and I’m so grateful to be able to share it with our PARKers listening. This podcast is all about, you know, uniting people who are performing acts of random kindness around the world and really magnifying our voices and generating more of that currency that I think this world is in desperate need of, way more than their need of money.

[07:09] Murray: Absolutely.

[07:12] AD: Hey, PARKer real quick, if you’re someone who needs a website, landing pages, email platform and want it all in one place, then I think you’ll love Kajabi as much as I do. It’s my new favorite all in one business platform to host my online courses and stay engaged with my community. I’ve got a special 28-day free trial offer that you can see for yourself how Kajabi can help you. Visit marlyq.com/14 for a direct link to your 28-day free trial today.

[07:39] Marly Q: Murray, thank you so much for sharing your book with us and sharing your heart and your passion, you sound like someone to me who, maybe perhaps doesn’t normally brag or promote your acts of kindness, is that an accurate assumption?

[07:57] Murray: Oh well, yeah, probably. Yeah, I don’t like to make a big deal.

[08:03] Marly Q: Right. You sound like a very humble person to me, which I honor and I respect dearly and what I love is how you can be that way and also create a book and a website and a platform for others to share their acts of random kindness and I’d love to hear, you know, your thoughts on sharing acts of kindness versus keeping them anonymous.

[08:29] Murray: Yeah, well, look, I think, look, I think, you know, I guess, you know, the more that people do share their acts of kindness through, I mean, the work that you do, I was just absolutely blown away with your talk and, you know, the movement that you’ve created Marly is amazing. And I think, you know, the more people you know, recognize the benefit, as you say that, you know, kindness is a currency and the slogan for world kindness and I’m pretty sure he has ambassadors, you know, for World Kindness, you know, obviously honoree positions but the slogan for World Kindness is “The Courage to be Kind”, which I think really sums it up. You know, I think, sadly, we live in a world that’s, you know, disconnected and you know, we’re all here on the planet together and you know, we’re all, you know, and particularly at the moment where we are, it just makes me realize how vulnerable we all are and, you know, we’re all here, you know, we’re all here together on this planet spinning around, or trying to work out, you know, what the hell we’re here for. And I just think, you know, the more we can connect through kindness, the better the world would be.

[09:37] Marly Q: I so agree. I absolutely agree, since you listened to my TED talk, and that’s what sparked the connection, I’m not sure if you noticed, you’d have to listen pretty carefully right in the beginning with my opening question was, you know, if you could have any superpower in the world, what would it be? And someone from the audience, from the back of the room, said out loud, “Money.”. And I obviously only had, you know, 20 minutes–

[Cross talk]

[10:01] Marly Q: Yes, it’s very subtle and I, you know, kind of went right over it, I smiled though. I smiled because and you know, I only had 20 minutes to deliver this talk so, it wasn’t an interactive conversation with the audience, but I did hear him scream out, you know, as a superpower, money, and I smiled because I truly believe that the currency of kindness is the superpower– is the real superpower. And if we were to value that, we would live in a completely different world, we would truly heal mankind.

[10:35] Murray: Completely different world.

[10:37] Marly Q: Yes. So, I always smile when I hear that, you know, and sometimes I get criticized, you know, for, you know, “bragging” about acts of kindness or encouraging people to share their acts of kindness. And although I was raised to believe that you keep your acts of kindness anonymous, my life has taught me, you absolutely have the power to impact so many more people when you have the courage to be kind, when you have the courage to share that too.

I created BRAG as an acronym to stand for “Be Real And Grateful”.

So, whenever I “brag” about kindness that either I do, that I’ve seen, that other people are doing, this whole podcast is to BRAG about kindness, it really comes from a place of being real and grateful about the power that kindness has to inspire and impact other people. So, with that, I BRAG about you and I BRAG about your book, gladly, because I do believe it has a superpower to change the world.

[11:40] Murray: Thanks, Marly. No, I think there’s definitely some power in the book, and I think it’s really interesting, I’ve been involved in the sales and marketing my whole life and now saying, you know, I’m pretty successful at it but you’re the guru. You know, your kindness, really, you’re doing all the work you’re doing and it’s just, it’s so powerful.

[12:02] Marly Q: Yes, I’m definitely no guru; I am definitely a recipient and a testimony for the power of kindness and the power specifically of small acts of kindness, they really truly have the power to impact, not just your day, how you’re feeling in that moment, but your actions from then on out and ultimately your life. So, I am living proof that no act of kindness is ever wasted and I thank you for your act of kindness of watching my TED talk and being inspired to not just listen to it, but take another action and an initiative to find me, check out my website, reach out, send me a book and be on this podcast today. I think that that right there is the currency of kindness in action and I do hope that our PARKers listening are inspired by this interview, are inspired by the opportunity to win your book and go to your website and make a pledge and receive their soft copy as well.

[13:04] Murray: Oh, thank you, Marly, thank you very much for your time and it’s an absolute pleasure, it’s been fantastic talking to you.

[13:13] Marly Q: Likewise, big, big virtual hugs all the way. My first friend in Brisbane, Australia. Thank you for joining us.

[13:20] Murray: There you go, my first friend from Miami, Florida, so there you go.

[13:24] Marly Q: Yay, awesome.

[13:27] Murray: Thanks, Marly. Thank you very much.

[13:30] Outro:

“The lesson to reach out to each other is clear and if the money runs out, there’ll be nothing to fear.

New thoughts and ideas will replace ways of old and life as we know it will become pure gold.”

That was a piece from the final pages of Murray’s book; I loved reading it and can’t wait to give away a signed hard copy of this precious children’s book to one of you listening.

To win, all you need to do is …

1) Join my Kind Qrew

2) Leave a kind review on iTunes

This will help give our podcast the visibility that it deserves and further our mission to inspire and ignite kindness worldwide.

Thank you for being the spark of kindness. See you next time. [14:32]

There’s a big difference between having “an attitude of gratitude” & living in gratitude.

Today’s episode shines the light on this distinction thanks to Vismaya Rubin, Founder of Living in GRATITUDE Today. 

This PARKer & “Gratitude Gangsta” is on a mission to strengthen people’s gratitude muscle so we can all experience more love, joy & prosperity in our lives.

SHOW NOTES:

Click here to Join Living in GRATITUDE Today Movement and receive your FREE Gratitude Monthly Calendar. If you’re in the United States, you can also text the word GRATEFUL to 64600 

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hi PARKer, I’m Marly Q and welcome to Episode 13 with Vismaya Rubin. Have you ever met a “gratitude gangsta”? Well, you’re about to! Our guest today is the founder of Living in GRATITUDE Today, and not only is she a PARKer, like us, she’s a gratitude gangsta on a mission to strengthen people’s gratitude muscles so that we could all experience more love, joy, and prosperity in our lives.

Vismaya is a three-time bestselling author who teaches people about the power of gratitude at both live and virtual events worldwide, she also coaches people on the benefits of a gratitude practice, how to start one and most importantly, how to maintain one during difficult times.

So, if you’re wondering if it’s possible to experience the difficult times we’re facing today and gratitude at the same time, let’s listen and find out.

[01:06] Welcome, it’s so nice to have you here virtually, thank you for making the time to be kind.

[01:11] Vismaya: It is my pleasure, my pleasure, I will do anything I can do to support you.

[01:17] Marly Q: You know, you were one of the first people when I shared that I was starting this podcast to say, “Hey, count me in if you’re going to do an interview format, I want to support and be a part of it.”, and here we are. So, thank you.

[01:28] Vismaya: You’re welcome. I absolutely love every post you put out, everything you do, you– I feel from everything you do. You’re just– you’re a ray of sunshine, and your posts are always so positive, and I missed you when you weren’t online. I was looking for you, I’m like, “Where’s my girl?”.

[01:48] Marly Q: Ah, my 100 days of self-care, social media detox.

[01:52] Vismaya: Yeah, I noticed, I was like, “Where is she?”.

[01:55] Marly Q: Oh, thank you for that. Thank you for missing me. I appreciate it. It’s so good to be back with, just kind of renewed and refreshed energy and have been able to redirect my focus and my time and my energy into creating this podcast and launching it. So, here we are and I’m so excited and grateful to have you here today because the topic is gratitude. And I want our PARKers listening to know why gratitude is your message and how you became a gratitude gangsta.

[02:27] Vismaya: So, I think I’ve always had a gratitude practice, I didn’t realize that it was a gratitude practice; I used to say I was lucky, I was really, I was lucky; that was the word I used. My mom is bipolar, and I grew up, you know, with a bipolar mother and my parents got divorced when I was three, but I always had these incredible experiences in my life. And maybe because my mother was bipolar, we had some pretty incredible things that happened and people always wanted to feel sad for, you know, sad for me or pity me or feel sorry for me and I remember, even as a little girl, that was not an option. So, I was like, “Are you kidding? I’m lucky. Look at all these things that happened to me and for me.”. So, I think I’ve always practiced gratitude, it wasn’t until I was much older that I realized that it was a gratitude practice, not that I was just lucky, and that really pushed me to do a lot of amazing things and have a lot of amazing experiences. And when I was teaching, character development was always very important for me and one of my last years teaching, my last few years, they had me teaching a writing class where before I was teaching about the Seven Habits of Highly Effective teens. And the last year I was teaching, we had to do evidence-based writing. So, I was like, “Alright, this is wonderful.”. So, I was teaching, or having my students read about the power of gratitude and the science behind gratitude, and they were keeping gratitude charts. So, if you ever tell a ninth grader, “Hey, you’re going to keep a gratitude chart.”, they’re going to look at you like you’ve lost your mind, and that’s basically what happened. So, the beginning, you know, first day of school, “Hey, we’re going to keep a gratitude chart, come up with 20 things that you’re grateful for by the end of the month, turn it in.”, and they were not happy in the beginning.

But fast forward, and it was probably, maybe February or March, we were having a discussion and I said– we were reading a story about two kids who had gotten into a gang and then they had gotten out and I said, “I don’t understand why people would be in a gang.”. And I’ll never forget, as long as I live, Alex looks at me and he says, “Miss, we’re gangsters. We’re gratitude gangsters.”, and my heart opens and then William chimes in, he goes, “Yeah”, he’s like, “We walk around and say to people, I like your shirt.”, and then they’re back and forth, “I like your shoes and I like your belt.”, and you know those guns, the ones that have the pop out flares? I’m like, “No guns.”, he’s like, “Miss, the ones that say, “Thank You”, because that’s what we carry around.”. So, in that moment, I realized that 15-year olds understood the power of gratitude. So, in the beginning, I got a lot of flak for calling myself a gratitude gangster, people were like, “You can’t say that. That’s not nice.”, but now I proudly say it.

[05:17] Marly Q: Nice. I love that story so much because, you know, ninth grade is such a, such a formative year, right? You’re not a middle schooler, but you’re still kind of like at the, you know, starting off in a high school and, maybe your focus as a ninth grader is, the furthest thing is, you know, gratitude. You’re like, “I’m just trying to exist here and figure out what it means to be in high school.”, and to have been able to create an environment for 15 year olds to be grateful, to practice gratitude, I’m sure was, you know, not just heart opening, you know, for you but for every single one of your students as well. What was the spark that had you, because that’s where– how we first met, as a teacher at my own alma mater. So, long ago, no need to date it. And I just remember ninth grade being a very formative year for me as well, where I started speaking up, I started, you know, leading meetings and being the president of the interact club and started finding my passion and my talent for creating events, and really kind of unifying people, kind of the start of my own journey as well. So, I just think that’s so important.

[06:32] Vismaya: I remember.

[06:33] Marly Q: What was the spark to you, like leaving teaching and starting your own business? Tell me about that.

[06:38] Vismaya: You know, I can’t sit in a classroom and tell kids to go for their dreams, to– that they can do anything they want to do and then not go for mine, and I knew that it was time for me to leave the system. And again, you know, I had to walk the walk, and I had to walk the walk if I was going to talk to talk and that was a big one for me and I did it for them and I did it for myself. Like, it was just kind of, it was time for me to go, and it was also again, you know, if I don’t do it now, when am I going to do it? If I don’t take a chance now, am I going to always look back and say, “I wish, what if, maybe.”? So, I said, you know, I got a jump and I took the jump and three years later, I’m very happy.

[07:25] Marly Q: Beautiful. Tell us about your business, about Living in Gratitude Today.

[07:30] Vismaya: So, Living in Gratitude Today, the idea is that regardless of what’s going on in life, we can find something to be grateful for. And it’s not the idea that everything is perfect every second of every day, because I don’t believe that and I believe that it’s a gratitude practice, not an attitude of gratitude, like you really get to work and you get to consciously look for those things. So, the idea is that, I have an online gratitude movement, and each week, we’re tapping into different ways that we can really look at gratitude or tap into that space of gratitude or practice gratitude. So, there are just different techniques that I read about or learn about. I do a lot of research on gratitude, and then I get to share them with my community. We have an online Facebook group, a private Facebook group, we have some meetings that are happening, where we’re really just building this idea of how do we strengthen that muscle, so that when we’re in different situations, we’re still able to see the juiciness and the deliciousness in it. And again, that doesn’t mean that we don’t experience sadness, or pain or frustration or any of those things, because we do, but how do you pull yourself out much quicker? And that’s through the practice of gratitude.

[08:45] Marly Q: Absolutely. I know that I always say, you know, kindness is your superpower and I believe gratitude is a superpower as well. And I know we’re on the same page about that.

[08:54] Vismaya: Absolutely.

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[09:27] Marly Q: And let’s get practical here, right? Because we always– we hear, you know, you should be grateful and this should be you know, your attitude of gratitude, like you said, but what I love about your work and your message and your mission is that you’re constantly reminding people it’s a practice, it’s a practice, you’ve got this great, you know, merchandise line with your T shirts, you’re always wearing your gratitude and your grateful shirts, I’m wearing mine today in your honor. What are some of your favorite practices that you share with folks your gratitude practice, if you can share with us?

[09:58] Vismaya: Absolutely. So, I think the first one is to wake up every day and declare that today is going to be a magical day, and what you’re doing is, you’re telling the universe, you’re telling the world, you’re telling yourself, “This is what I’m up to. This is what I’m expecting for today.”. So, that’s the first thing before I even get out of bed, “Today is going to be a magical day!”, even if I don’t believe it, I say it. And then the next thing I would say to somebody, if you have– if you don’t have a gratitude practice, we walk around with our cell phones, turn your cell phone on, have it go off every three to four hours, when the alarm goes off, pause, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, “What are my gratitude wins? Who or what made a difference for me? What did I do for myself? Did I do something new or something nice for somebody and then what made me smile or laugh till my sides hurt?”. And here’s the beauty because it is a gratitude practice, not a gratitude perfect, you’re going to do this every three to four hours. So, if you don’t find something that you’re grateful for in that moment, it’s okay, give yourself a break. And it’s kind of like what you said, like, learning to be kind to yourself and this is also what this practice is about, be kind to yourself, if you don’t find something right now, that’s okay. Because you’re going to do it again.

[11:16] Marly Q: I love that, it’s not a gratitude perfect, it’s a gratitude practice. And sometimes when we hear you know, like, join this practice or join this challenge, we immediately want to perfect it, we want to be great at it and if we, you know, miss our gratitude practice assignment, we’re like, “We’re a failure. We didn’t do it.”, and we’re beating ourselves up, and that’s where the self-love and kindness comes in, right? And even in moments when we’re experiencing dark times or difficult emotions, even there, I mean, you started off by sharing, you know, a bit of your story, your parents divorcing at three, difficult situation, you know, growing up with your mom, you know, being bipolar; I’m sure there were several, you know, difficult situations or reasons to feel sad or feel confused or anxious. And yet, you’re still able to look around and say, “I’m lucky. Look at all this around me. Look at this beauty around me and look.”, but it is something that you need to practice seeing and the more we practice looking for things to be grateful for, the more things we have to be grateful for.

[12:14] Vismaya: Absolutely.

[12:15] Marly Q: And I know for me in any moment, you know, I wake up and I have my own gratitude practice as well. And for me, even in moments when I don’t feel like it, right? And I can’t genuinely find something that I’m like feeling grateful for, not just thinking grateful, right? Like, I’m grateful for my family, I’m grateful for, you know, the new day but really feeling grateful, I could always come back to, I feel really grateful for this breath. I think our breath is on anchor, right? Even when there’s nothing to be grateful for, in this moment, you are breathing and that breath is a gift, and that, if nothing else, is something to be grateful for in every moment. Would you agree?

[12:58] Vismaya: I do and I do love that practice because I think when you’re taking that deep breath, what it does is it brings you back to the present, it brings you back to your consciousness, your present– this present moment where you can start to then again, look. I have to, you know, I think, for me, what happens is that the more we practice gratitude, when times are great, the easier it is to see those magical moments when life is challenging. So, like you said, you take a deep breath, and it brings you back, I think what happens for me is that, what happens is when I’m in my crazy space, or in my mind, and it’s going– and running around, there’s a voice inside of my head that says, “Vismaya, you know, the universe has your back and you know that everything will work out.”, and that’s because that practice has been, it’s just part of who I am right now. It’s part of my being but that’s what makes it super easy for me.

[13:54] Marly Q: Yeah, that’s how it’s your default because it’s a lifestyle, it’s a practice and it might be difficult for some people at first, who don’t have that practice, right? Which is why I love that you’ve created this movement and this program to help people own their own gratitude practice because it looks different for everyone, right? A self-care and self-love and kindness practice looks different for everyone. People ask me for tips and advice on, you know how to be kinder to yourself, and we can give you tips and advice but at the end of the day, you need to know what works for you. The reason that my breath works for me every single time is because I grew up with chronic asthma, and every day as a little kid, I’d wake up and the first thing I’m doing is checking on my breath, am I breathing? And I would smile and say, “Thank you.”. It’s that simple; that’s why my breath always brings me back, you know, but for someone else, it’s looking at, you know, the sky and the sun and the clouds and that makes you realize that you’re part of this planet, right? This part of this huge you know, universe. I mean, whatever it is for you and you only find what gratitude practices work for you by practicing it and developing and strengthening that superpower. So, I really am a fan and a supporter of the work that you do, I think it’s powerful, I think it’s important. And I think that the time to be kind and grateful is now more than ever.

[15:14] Vismaya: Absolutely. We’re always asked the question, you know, “Are happier people grateful, or are grateful people happier?”, and I think what it always comes down to is when you practice gratitude, you’re ultimately happier. And when you’re happier, you’re more productive, you have greater relationships, you’re more connected to the people around you. So, I think that is one of the main reasons why I would absolutely encourage people to start a gratitude practice. There’s also research that shows that when you’re stressed out, your cortisol levels are really high and it’s all over your body and it takes about 24 hours for that cortisol level to go– to subside and when you practice gratitude, it releases the positive, the good feeling chemicals into the brain and that kind of counteracts the levels of cortisol. So, there are definitely scientific reasons, but I think the main reason is that even if you’re not into the science, it makes you feel good, right? People don’t wake up and say, “I want to be grateful.”, but they wake up and say, “I want to feel better. I want to feel happier. I want to feel connected to the people around me. I want to feel more productive. I want to feel excited about life.”, and that’s how you get that.

[16:28] Marly Q: I’m with you. Preach gratitude gangster, I’m with you. So, I know that you have a special gift for, you know, our PARKers listening, and anyone that visits livingingratitudetoday.com, if you need some ideas on how to practice gratitude in your own life, you’ve got a monthly calendar. I love this, right?

[16:51] Vismaya: I do. I put them together each month and it’s filled with– each day, there’s a different gratitude action step that you can take so that if you’re not feeling super grateful or excited you can do the action step and it creates this moment of gratitude for you. Some of them are things that you can do for yourself, some of them are things you could do for other people and if something works for you, continue to do it, if you like everything on the calendar, do them all.

[17:17] Marly Q: Awesome. I love it. Vismaya, thank you so much for making the time to be kind today and also your gifts to help us all practice more gratitude in our lives.

[17:24] Vismaya: It is my pleasure; I will say yes to anything you do.

[17:28] Marly Q: Thank you, big big virtual hugs.

[17:31] Outro: I hope you enjoyed making this time to be kind together today because living in gratitude allows the currency of kindness to flow into our daily lives and opens our hearts to connect with ourselves, each other and the world on a deeper level. Having a daily gratitude practice is key to experiencing more happiness, greater self-esteem, less stress and resilience, giving you the spark of light that you need to see your way through dark times. If you’re ready to start strengthening your gratitude muscle, just visit marlyq.com/13 to join Vismaya’s Living in Gratitude Today movement and get your free gratitude calendar too.

Today’s episode was recorded before COVID-19 and the tragic deaths of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor and George Floyd and although it may not seem like the right time to be promoting hugs …we believe the Time to be Kind to all manKIND is NOW!

This is our humble way of virtually embracing all black lives around the world who – not only matter – but deserve to be seen, heard, understood, valued, respected and have the light shine on them & their stories in positive ways. #wePARK

SHOW NOTES:

Learn more about Big Dave Hugs the World in 80 Days Tour

Follow on Instagram @thehumanhigh5

ThankQ to our Episode PARKner: Chris Colina Realtor

Interested in sponsoring Time to be Kind with Marly Q.? Click here

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hi, PARKer, I’m Marly Q and welcome to Episode 12 with David Sylvester, better known around the world as Big Dave.

This man is awesome, you may think I’m exaggerating, but this PARKer from Philadelphia has personally hugged and high fived over half a million people, from newborns, to 100-year olds, in 50 states and 42 countries since the 9/11 tragedy in 2001. This interview was recorded before the tragic deaths of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor and George Floyd and even though I recognize right now may not seem like the right time to be promoting hugs …

…the Time to be Kind to all mankind is now.

I’m offering this episode as a humble way of collectively wrapping our arms around the world, to embrace all black lives who not only matter, but deserve to be seen, heard, understood, valued, respected, and have the light shine on them in positive ways.

So, today, let’s let the light shine brightly on Big Dave’s story and learn how he was able to turn a tragedy into inspiration to be the spark and hug the world.

[01:25] Marly Q: If you could just give us a brief overview of how this all got started, how did you turn this tragedy that we all experienced into inspiration?

[01:34] Big Dave: You know, it was after I lost my friend, I wanted to do something. I think if anybody that was alive then or really remembers that time, is that I think we all felt powerless. I think we all felt like we were, you know, potential victims, just being an American, just for being in a big city, we all just felt like, you know, something as innocent as a plane that just transports people could be turned against us. And I mean, it was something that I just, I didn’t like that feeling and, you know, and that coupled with the fact that I just lost my friend, I wanted to do something. And what I found is that, you know, when I bicycled across the United States to honor my friend, is that almost everybody I met, regardless of what they wanted to express, whether it was patriotism, camaraderie, whether it was consoling me, they all expressed it with a hug and it was something that, you know, I just, I really didn’t think of at the time, but it was just, I was just out there just honoring my friend by biking across the United States. And, you know, what I found is that, you know, like I said, after it was all over, the one thing that was common in almost everything, in everyone that I met was that they just wanted a hug. So, I really thought about that and I wanted to continue this sort of this very unique view of humanity that I had. So, I next rode my bicycle across Africa from Cairo to Cape Town, and it was the same thing even though we’re a few years removed from September 11th, even though, you know, I was in a different continent, different countries, I mean, people still wanted to connect via a hug. And so, I continued on by biking Asia, North America again, Australia and everywhere I went, you know, once I really opened up my self and told my story, people just wanted to connect and just wanted a hug. And it wasn’t even something that I was overtly asking for, it was just there.

And so, one thing kind of like I said, it just sort of led one thing to another in the first overt Hug and High Five tour was in Australia in 2014, when I just, not only biked from Sydney to Melbourne, I also challenged myself to hug and high five a thousand people in a month, no signs, no preamble, just going up to people and you know, sharing my story and say, “Hey, you want a hug?”, and then taking a picture of it. And when I was able to do that in 22 days, you know, 1000 people in 22 days it was, it really got me thinking about really going after it and just trying to hug and high five as many people as I could. So, you know, and that’s kind of just a brief overview of how it all started. I just wanted to do something to honor a friend and just, you know, I think like anything, when you do something new, you, you know, you stop and you take stock of what happened and, you know, it’s been interesting because that is the one thing that sort of, everybody wants, you know, and especially as we’ve gotten more and more, you know, polarized in terms of politically or gender, this or whatever, I mean, the one thing that really cuts through all that is just hugs and high fives and so, it’s been good.

[04:56] Marly Q: Nothing beats a human touch. Have you ever had an experience where your hug or your high five wasn’t welcome?

[05:06] Big Dave: It’s all the time. I mean, listen, it’s not that deep to me. And so, I get it and if you don’t want it, you don’t want it, and that’s fine.

[05:14] Marly Q: Keep going.

[05:15] Big Dave: Yeah, just keep it moving man.

[05:17] Marly Q: And keep it going because the large majority of people really need almost that persistence of kindness. So, they may not, you know, they see you that first time around, they don’t really trust or you know, see it as a gimmick, like you said, or, “Oh, just trying to get attention”, right? Some people may see it that way.

[05:34] Big Dave: Some people do.

[05:35] Marly Q: But you see it as persistence and you see a consistent behavior, I think the kindness shines through when people see that you’re really just trying to give and be available to people.

[05:45] Big Dave: Well, I will say that one of the nicest texts that I ever got, was from a guy that apologized for not hugging me. I had an event in Virginia Beach, and he wrote to me that he was in a coffee shop where I was and thought that I was selling something and thought that this was some sort of, you know, cheesy event and he said, but you know, he never saw any money exchanged and he said that everybody that walked away from me, he said, he thought it was it was interesting that whatever I was selling, everyone was hugging me after they purchased it.

And so, he said that, you know, he looked into me and into my story after he left, and he said, you know, “I really shouldn’t have just judged you. And, you know, I apologize. I owe you a hug the next time I see you.”.

And so, it’s, you know, sometimes people have their own misconceptions about what things are, about who people are and stuff like that, and that’s cool. You know, it’s, I get it. I mean, I think we all do it from time to time. And, you know, I applaud this guy for just being you know, man enough to admit, “Hey, listen man, I was wrong, you know? I was incorrect in my assumption.”.

[07:02] Marly Q: I think that’s amazing. Thank you so much for sharing that. And I’m sure that in your travels and where you’ve been all over the world, you’ve encountered some of that and that’s why I brought it up. I mean, you’re an African American man, and I’m sure in places that you’ve seen, or that you’ve visited, you’ve been the first black man that people have ever seen and you’re coming up and hugging them, right? So, that experience must be unique.

[07:24] Big Dave: That is, yeah, that is definitely true. There’s a lot of places where, you know, especially throughout Asia, I mean, let’s be real, I mean, there are a lot of places in Africa where they hadn’t experienced, they hadn’t met an African American before so it’s been interesting to hold the flag, so to speak for black Americans around the world, but I mean, that’s why I go in hugging and high fiving, I go in smiling, I go in clear, because I want to make it easier for the next person. You know, I want the next brother that comes behind me to have you know, an even easier time than I have, you know going places and stuff like that.

[08:09] Marly Q: I think that’s awesome and an incredibly powerful way to PARK (Perform Acts of Random Kindness). Let me ask you big Dave, have you ever felt, kind of like burnt out or drained from hugging so many people or hearing so many stories that are you know, kind of emotionally charged? And if you have, how do you recharge yourself? How do you PARK for yourself?

[08:28] Big Dave: You know what? I’m burnt out now, this interview’s over.

[08:31] Marly Q: Oh no! Come back, virtual hug!

[08:37] Big Dave: I am, there are times. I mean, one of the things that really got me, one time I was at a hospital, was in the dementia wing and I talked to this woman who she said, “I know I’m not in my right mind but I’m good now and I think what you’re doing is simply beautiful.”, and she gave me a big hug, and I went back around to see her about 45 minutes later, and she had no idea who I was and that really broke my heart. I mean, it really got to me to the point, I mean, I just, I needed a long moment to get myself together. So, you know, I, you know, I told the people who were organizing the event, I was supposed to go somewhere else, I was like, “Look, we have to cancel this next thing and then I’ll go to the thing after that, but I just, I need to go somewhere and cry for a bit.”. And so, sometimes it’s hard to process some stuff, but, you know, because of that, I’m just, I’m very cognizant, I’m very aware of my feelings and my time, and yeah, I just get out. I just, I get out when I have to.

[09:51] Marly Q: I think that’s so important to share. Thank you for doing so. So, with all of the incredibly memorable and meaningful acts of kindness that I’m sure you have received throughout the world, is there any one in particular that stands out that really impacted you?

[10:08] Big Dave: You know, listen, if you were to ask me this question 10 times, I’d give you 10 different memorable moments. So, I am going to talk about something that happened when the first, the very first ride and we were in Wisconsin, and my friend and I were bicycling across the country, and we saw this woman, she’s jogging, and we’re talking to her and it was in the middle of nowhere, and we just had a nice conversation as she’s jogging, as we’re cycling along. And in the middle of the conversation, she just took off and she, you know, cut through some farmland and it was just, it was weird, because we were having a nice conversation, but it was, there was no goodbye, there was no, “I don’t want to talk to you.”, there was no, there was no nothing. It was just, no egress, it was just, she was just out.

And so, I was like, “That was just really weird.”. So, my friend and I kept cycling for a while, and we biked a little way up the road, we made a right and we’re biking, biking, biking and then all of a sudden, as we are biking down the road, we see two little kids standing on the side of the road with a sign and as we get closer, you know, little kids that you can see, they’re just jumping up and down. We can also see some balloons that are jumping up and down, and they’re waving us on, and we figured that maybe some other cyclists had bypassed them before and so they thought it was a bike race or something like that. So, we were prepared to ride right by him and then all of a sudden, right when we got up on the kids, the kids, you know, “Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.”, and we stopped and the kids were so excited and were like, “We heard you were coming.”. Like, “What are you talking about?”, and it was just weird talking to two little kids on the side of the road, and it was, I told my boy, Scott, I was like, “Yo, man, this is strange man, it’s time to go man.”. And he said, “Yeah, man, it’s time to go”. So, we were like, “Bye kids!”, and all of a sudden the kids said, “You can’t leave, the cookies aren’t done yet.”.

And we’re like, “What are you talking about?”, and then all of a sudden the woman that we had just talked to who, you know, apparently what she had done, had darted through farmland to get to the back of her house to tell her family, “Hey, look, there’s some cool cyclists that are coming by.”, and she threw some cookies in the oven, and, excuse me, the balloons were left over from her mother’s birthday party the day before. See, you know, the kids made a sign that said, “Go bikers.”, and all of a sudden, like all of this happened just in a relatively short amount of time. And she said, “I knew you were going to be coming right past our house.”.

And so, we ended up staying, you know, sitting on a porch with this woman that we had met and her family and these two little kids, I mean, just for probably about 45 minutes, you know, just and that was just the random act of kindness. Just a random– just random. And it was just something that really let me know that, you know, there really are some very, very, very good people out there and a lot of times, if you just give people the chance, give people the opportunity, good things will happen. And I think that, you know, I think in general, I mean, it’s, you know, it’s all about the energy that you put out, it’s all about what you engender. I mean, if you are constantly looking for the bad side of people, it’s, I mean, there’s, you know, look, if you want trouble, it’s out there. It’s out there, you know, in droves. But at this, you know, conversely, if you want goodness, it’s out there, it’s out there as well. You just have to want it and that’s it and it’s not going to be easy, you know, just like anything, you know, but if you want it, it is out there.

And I think that’s the important thing to tell people. I mean, you know, it’s just with my story, I have hugged a half a million people that means I have easily encountered a million, a million and a half people in 19 years. If I want to really look at it from a really crappy lens, you know, I’ll be like, “Oh my god.”, you know, I’m going to be constantly focused on the people that didn’t hug me and how I choose to look at it is the people that did hug me, how I choose to look at it is, the people where I did have good connections, how I choose to look at it is, you know, all of the smiles that I’ve seen, I’ve now seen, you know, half a million smiles in every color, shape, accent, you know that imaginable, and that’s how I choose to look at it. And I think it’s, you know, I would say that anybody that’s listening to this, in fact, if you’re listening to this podcast, you obviously believe that there’s good things out there, you believe that there’s good people out there and, that’s it, let that be, you know the bedrock of your day, that there are good people out there. And that’s it and so, it’s in belief.

I think it’s important that for anybody that is, you know, on a mission, whatever that mission is, is to really, you know, remember why you’re in this.

You know, I’m in this for good reasons, I’m in here for you know, for happy reasons. So, like I said, if you ask me this question again in an hour, I’ll give you a completely different answer that is just as vivid to me. Because that’s why I got into this. And so, I think there are tough times, you know, it ain’t free, you know, it comes at a cost, it comes at a cost in terms of time, money and everything, you know, it’s a lot. But when it does, when I do think about the mounting costs and stuff like that, I have to remember that woman in Wisconsin, I have to remember the smile on those kids’ faces, I have to remember all the good times and I’ve had so many good times, and I’ve had so many beautiful moments. And that’s what I have to remember in order to continue on and that’s what I focus on all the time, is the good times.

[16:52] Marly Q: Oh, Dave, you are my definition of a superhero. You know, this podcast is really about shining the light on you know, the everyday regular, if you will, person that has this superpower of kindness within them, right? So, you found your bike, you found your why, you turned, you know, a tragic moment into inspiration to go out and pedal the world for 19 years and we’re coming up on the 20th anniversary of 9/11. And you know, for those listening out there that might think like, “Wow, you know, I can’t do you know, what big Dave is doing.”, I just want this conversation to remind everyone listening is, and I think you say it, I’m quoting you is, “Find your own bike.”, what is it for you?

[17:33] Big Dave: I mean, yeah, find your own thing. I mean, you can do it. I mean, listen, it’s great to hear somebody that’s 19 years into a story and then you know, but then you know, sometimes people think, “Oh my god, I can’t do that.”, it hasn’t always been 19 years. You know, I remember when it was five years in and when it was 10 years and when it was two years in and it’s, like I said, it hasn’t been easy, but that’s why I focused in on the good times, I’ve focused in on all those smiles. That’s why I’ve stayed in contact with a lot of those people and with social media now, it’s a lot easier to stay in contact with those people and sort of build your own coalition, build your own platform. But it’s, but stay at it, and it doesn’t and listen, if you listen to my story, it wasn’t always hugs and high fives it was, you know, it sort of grew into that. So, don’t think that, you know, whatever your theme of goodness is today that it has to stay that way, it has to stay good, but it doesn’t always have to stay that way. And then when you are true to yourself, no one can take you under, you know, no one can take you down and you have the freedom to change direction and grow in the way that you want to grow.

And so, I would just say, you know, for anybody that is listening to this podcast, if you find yourself down, if you find yourself doubting, if you find yourself, you know, wondering, “Can you still stay in the game?”, you know, call me and let’s talk about it. My number is 267-252-1974, I only got one frigging phone and that’s it. And so, just call me, you want to talk about it, I’ll listen, I will listen.

There was one time when I was, this is early on, this is probably like the fourth year, the fourth or fifth year when I was like, “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t do it. I can’t afford it. I can’t you know, I’m paying for these trips out of my own pocket, I can do it.”. And so, one of my co workers and good friends was sitting with me while I was in the gym and I had the wanted ads out, and she was like, “What are you doing?”, I said, “I can’t do this man. I got to; I’m done. I got to find a real job, a real job that pays more, this, that, and the other.”, or whatever, and I said, “I’m done.”. And, you know, my friend got angry at me and snatched the wanted ads out of my hand and I was like, you know, “What’s your problem?”, and she’s like, “Dave!”, she said, you know, “You have no idea how many of us live through you. How many of us, you know, are always you know, when you leave the room, we talk about the cool things that you do in the world, the cool things that you say, the cool things that happen.”, she said, “You make us all stronger.”. And she said, “If you can’t hack it, then what about the rest of us?”. And so, she’s like, “You have to hang in this for the rest of us.”. And she started opening up about times that she wanted to quit, but I was just, I was doing my own thing, and she said and was like, “You know what? I’m going to hang in there for a little bit longer.”. So, she was like, “Dave, please, please just hang in there for another week. I’m sure something will come.”. So, that was Sunday, Tuesday, I got a call from a teacher that said she wanted me to speak to her students and she said that she couldn’t pay me but she did read that I joked one time that I will work for food and she said that, “If you will let me buy you lunch that day, anywhere you want, I would love to have you speak to my students.”. And so, I was like, “Wow, all right, well, this is paying off.”. I mean, it’s not paying off in the way that I want but it is paying off in food. And so, I had a nice lunch that day, but it was, you know, wasn’t the lunch it was the fact that something did happen and how I chose to look at it was like, “You know what? Somebody is listening to me out there.”, and I hung in there for another week. And then a few weeks later, something else broke for me.

So, for the people that are out there that are at that point where they’re picking up, you know, picking up those wanted ads, either literally or metaphorically, you know, just call me, I understand what it’s like, you know, to struggle. I understand what it’s like to want to quit a million frigging times over. I understand this, but you know, but if you find yourself down and doubting, really, if you find yourself ready to get out, just call me. Like I said, 267-252-1974, I’m @thehumanhigh5 on Instagram, I’m very easy to spot. You know, and let’s talk about it. And more importantly, let’s talking about it, let’s keep you in the game. Let’s keep you in the game of life, let’s keep you in the game of happiness.

[22:24] Marly Q: Thank you so much for sharing that, I got emotional while you were sharing because I’ve been “in this kindness spreading game” myself since I was 10 years old and as a “business” for about 10 years now. And you know, on the 10th anniversary of 9/11 is when we produced our first big 5K event, our first big fundraising event that with no sponsors, no big email list, I mean, it was totally out of my pocket, my husband’s or my boyfriend at the time, who wasn’t even my husband yet; he married me luckily, even after everything I put him through. And we did this back four or five years all on passion, all on drive, all about the mission and man, did I burn out and I hit “bottom” of, “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t afford this, I cannot keep this engine moving and try and run a business and make you know my bills.”, and it was just one of those really low times which I wish I had your phone number because I would have really needed a talk and a virtual hug and it really is about the people that you surround yourself with that’s so powerful that keep me in the game, keep me focused on the mission, keep me focused on the why we do this, and really starting this podcast was a big journey for me and it’s another way of creating an event, an online virtual event and to keep this movement going, finding a different way, right? That’s not so cost burdensome like a huge event, right?

Find a different way to continue moving the mission and the movement forward because the truth is, the world needs kindness now more than ever, the world needs a hug now more than ever, and I know you agree with that a hundred thousand percent.

For those listening. I want them to follow your journey, to continue following your journey and supporting Big Dave Hugs the World in 80 days. I know that you’re working on this now and for, you know gearing up for the 20th anniversary of 9/11, how can people connect with you virtually online and support Big Dave Hugs the World?

[24:25] Big Dave: You know, support, I’ll just say this, support comes in a lot of different ways. Support can come obviously in the form of $1 but support can be in the form of a like, it can be in the form of a suggestion, it can be in the form of an encouraging word, you know, so, I would just say whoever, whatever it is that you want to support, whether it be me, you, whatever, you know, an artist, any kind of artist, you know, just support them, you know, support them in any way that you can, whatever you like, support it, to keep it going because the person that’s running that, you know, maybe a woman that, like, you know, is just doing this on pure passion and stuff like that. And she needs to know, “Hey, listen, you know, does anybody out there care?”, you know, and, right. And somebody like me who’s just like, you know, “I’m just out there trying to hug people and stuff like that, you know, and it’s just, and, you know, I need to know, does anybody out there care?”. You know, I go to business meetings a lot of times that people are like, you know, “This is silly. You know, this is silly; we’re not going to fund you, we’re not going to sponsor you.”. “All right, that’s okay. That’s a business decision. I get that.”, but then all of a sudden, you know, the, you know, and I could focus on that but what I do focus on is, all of the emails and the texts and stuff that I get from people around the planet, who love what I’m doing. When I went to Time Square on Black Friday to go hug people for the holidays in 1 10 minutes span, I got texts from people in Alaska, London, in Israel who said, “I’m so happy for what you’re doing. You know, I’m so happy.”, you know and that’s it. And that’s enough, that support, you know made me warm on that cold day, that support made me smile a little bit more, that support is what I needed. So, you know for people out there, support your artist.

[26:29] Marly Q: I love it. We could talk forever Big Dave, I know you got a busy day, maybe a plane to catch soon. Thank you so much for making the time to be kind today and joining us in this podcast and just sharing your light, your love, your smiles, your hugs, virtually with all of us.

[26:47] Big Dave: Thank you, bye-bye.

[26:50] Outro:

I told you Big Dave was awesome. He’s got so many uplifting stories to share so, we’ll definitely invite him back to hear all about his adventures hugging the world.

This episode was sponsored by Chris Colina Realtor, one of our founding PARKners who immediately enlisted to serve in the US Armed Forces shortly after 9/11 and now serves as a one of a kind realtor helping people buy or sell their home. Connect with @chriscolinarealtor on Instagram & give him a virtual hug & high5 for supporting Time to be Kind with Marly Q.

We’ve all been experiencing a “Looking Over the Edge” moment having to face fear, find our way & all the lessons in between such as:

• Why do we feel we’re not doing enough?
• Why do we feel guilty when we don’t make being kind a priority? 
• The courage & kindness it takes to put our ego aside to listen to our inner calling.
• The power of acknowledging & being appreciative of everything that happens.
• How we’re always in training for something bigger if we choose to find the lesson. 

SHOW NOTES:

Click Here to visit CarolinedePosada.com

Connect on Instagram @CarolinedePosada

Click here for your copy of Looking Over the Edge: A True Story of Fear, Finding Your Way and All The Lessons In Between

Interested in sponsoring Time to be Kind with Marly Q.? Click here for PARKnership Opportunities

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hey, welcome back PARKer. I’m Marly Q and this is Episode #10 with Caroline de Posada. Our guest today is a professional speaker, writer, attorney, wife and mom of three boys. She’s the author of Looking Over the Edge, a true story about facing fear, finding your way and all the lessons in between. Coming from divorced parents and a famous father who traveled the world extensively as a global speaker and best-selling author, Caroline teaches people the art of how to be there, even when you’re not, a lesson she learned firsthand from her dad, Dr. Joachim de Posada, who I had the immense privilege of meeting almost a decade ago. It wasn’t until five years ago, shortly after he passed away, that I got to meet Caroline and be impacted by her kindness. This interview was recorded a few months B.C. (Before Corona) and it’s so relevant to what we’re experiencing today because this global pandemic is a looking over the edge moment, where we’ve all had to face fear, we’ve realized how quickly things can change, how little control we have, and how it’s up to us to choose how we handle crisis and find the lesson. Because, as you’ll hear Caroline say, “life is always training you for something bigger”. Let’s listen.

[01:31] Marly Q: You know, you’re here for several different reasons. First, I really see you as an incredibly kind person, in your own being. But also, I really admire the way that you instill kindness in your children, and how you prioritize kindness in your family and in your own circle, and I just really honor and celebrate that. So, welcome to the show.

[01:55] Caroline: Thank you. Well, I– for me, that’s an honor coming from you because I consider you to be the guru of kindness, and you inspire me to be more kind and I just– for me, it’s an honor that you look at me that way. So, thank you Marly.

[02:11] Marly Q: Oh my goodness, absolutely. Well, you’re very welcome. I remember how we first met, actually a little indirectly. I was producing an event several years ago, and there was a speaker at this event, this world renowned, bilingual, amazing man talking about Don’t Eat the Marshmallow, and he just was this really magnificent energy was coming out of him; his name was Dr. Joachim de Posada.

[02:39] Caroline: I remember the event that you’re speaking about, but I don’t remember noticing you at that event. What I do remember was the event where we did meet, and it was at one of our friend’s houses, and you were– you came in and you were this force of energy, and you were bright and bubbly, and walking around and somehow somebody said to you, “You know who she is? She’s Joachim de Posada’s daughter.”, and you turn to me and you hugged me, you hugged me like if you had known me for years. And my dad had just passed away, and for me, that connection to you was so profound because it was– I could see through that hug how much you cared about him. And that made me so happy and grateful to be around– every time I’m around somebody that loved him, it was like, I have him back for a little while. And that was just, it was wonderful. So, that first impression of yours, for me, was so profound that I became loyal to you after that.

[03:35] Marly Q: Well, it’s mutual, we’re each other’s fans. Well, thank you for sharing that. I know that this interview wasn’t to talk about your dad, but I couldn’t not put him out into the airwaves here and share the great Joachim de Posada. I actually have his little cards, I remember when we had lunch one day and he was talking to me about what he was going to talk about at the event and he pulls out of his like suit pocket these little cards, it was like a little mini–

[04:00] Caroline: A mini book.

[04:01] Marly Q: A little mini book, and I just thought that was the coolest thing, how he walked around with something on his, you know, attire to be able to PARK, to Perform an Act of Random Kindness, and hand off inspiration to other people, and I still have those cards, right here in my home; they’re right here.

[04:16] Caroline: And I still give them out in his honor, and I use his exact wording. So, I– whenever I meet someone, I did it last week, I was at a event in Orlando and there was a cleaning person coming by and he was so nice to me, and I stopped him and I said, “Pick a number from 1 to 31”, and then he picked the number and it was number 9. I said, “Okay, open to page 9 and read your message for the day, that’s the message the universe has to give you.”, and I said, “My dad wrote this book, and if he were here, he would have done that so, I do it in his name.”.

[04:46] Marly Q: There’s always time to be kind, always time to be kind. And isn’t it interesting how sometimes we think that we don’t have time to be kind? Because to be kind, in some people’s minds means, “I have to go and feed the homeless, I have to, you know, put together this big project and collect toys, or produce this event or, you know, spend all weekend and go travel to, you know, Africa and do, you know, a whole retreat.”, when really, there’s always time to be kind in these small ways, and I’m just such a fan of small acts of kindness, I feel are just as powerful as these bigger acts of kindness. And the difference is that sometimes we don’t acknowledge, we don’t see these small acts of kindness like, you stopping to, you know, tell this person, what’s your page and give them that inspiration for the day, that could have changed that person’s day around, they could remember you way down the line, they can use that little book when they’re feeling down and those small acts of kindness make a huge difference and they’re just as valuable, right?

[05:54] Caroline: You know, you’re saying that because of the conversation we had before this podcast started, when I told you that I felt guilty that I wasn’t being kind enough. I am so guilty of feeling that way. I confess– I confess to you that I just, you know, I would not attribute that little story that I just shared with you so organically, I would never have attributed that as an act of kindness at all, and I actually looked at it as, a you know, something to inspire someone but I just wouldn’t label it kindness and when I think about being kind, I think, “God, I wish I could do a toy drive like Marly Q or, I wish I could do– I could go feed the homeless.”, and I really feel guilty when I don’t have– when I don’t make that a priority. I don’t like saying that I don’t have the time to do things because I think we all have the time to do whatever we want to do. So, I don’t– I’m not saying I don’t have the time, what I am saying is, is that, I have not made that a priority because I have so much on my plate that I consider to be my priority right now that haven’t wedged that part of it, and I want to.

[07:08] Marly: So, let’s talk about that. Let’s talk about that because I think that it’s so relevant and a lot of people listening can relate to that, which is why I brought it up. Because I started off by saying that I consider you to be a PARKer and one of the kindest people out there, and it has nothing to do, I have no idea what you do on the weekend, and if you go do beach cleanups, and if you do, you know, feed the homeless, it’s not about that.

It is about the little things. The day to day time that you make to speak kindly to someone, to give a smile, to lend an encouraging word, to drop a compliment and actually seeing the value of those things as really powerful acts of kindness is really one of the things that I hope to achieve with this podcast.

We all have time to be kind, even if in your current situation, in this current moment in your life, doing these, you know, bigger “PARK” projects, you know, whatever, if your current situation doesn’t allow for that, having the self-kindness to be like, “It’s okay, how can we, in every day, share kindness, inspire kindness?”, and those are just as valuable, just as powerful as these bigger acts of kindness and going easier on yourself, right? Not feeling guilty because that’s not a helpful emotion, right? And it’s not even a real one. There’s no reason to feel guilty, you haven’t done anything intentionally wrong in order to feel that way. The problem or the reason why you maybe feel that way is because you’re not seeing the value in your daily, daily, daily, many, many, many acts of kindness that you do.

[08:51] Caroline: And I think the reason we don’t see the value in it is because people take for granted what comes easy to them. So, for example, it is not difficult for me to smile at someone, it’s not difficult for me to share a kind word, or for me to share an inspirational message, that’s– for me, it’s like breathing. So, if it doesn’t come, I think that oftentimes people equate love with suffering, and kindness with sacrifice, right? There has to be some hardship in order for us, to give ourselves credit for it, for us to be able to validate ourselves, like, if it was difficult, or if it was out of our way, or if it was something that we did, despite how busy we are or despite– then, it’s valuable. But if it’s something that is just part of our persona, or a part of our personality, or something that comes naturally to us, and we didn’t “earn it”, then all of a sudden it doesn’t feel as good.

[09:49] Marly Q: I think a lot of people can relate with what you’re saying. And I really just think

it’s a practice of shifting our mindset and starting to see kindness in its true essence, in its true form, the big and the small and everything in between, because the energy of kindness is the same in all of the acts …

… whether they’re in your mind small, insignificant or natural to you, or whether you had to put in, you know, 200 hours in order to, you know, execute that, and I understand and I say this not from any kind of, you know, pedestal or high horse, I just had a baby about a year and a half ago and one of the most challenging things, you know, for me was kind of putting on hold all of my philanthropic desires, all of my big PARK projects, I mean, I love producing events in order to inspire people to come together and be kind and give back to their cause. I love coordinating, you know, our awesome toy drive and the beach clean-ups and all these different philanthropic projects, but for almost two years, I put that on the shelf and I definitely went through that kind of internal, you know, talk of, “You’re not doing enough, you’re not doing enough to spread kindness, you’ve like, abandoned your mission and your message.”, and none of these things are true. I had to become aware of that self-talk, let’s call it negative self-talk, really it’s just disempowering self-talk and see how within those two years where I didn’t produce a large scale event, where I didn’t, you know, produce the clean-ups and see, well, what did I do? I’m raising a family that’s, you know, based and rooted in kindness, and I’m focused on being kinder to myself, these last two years more than I ever have in my entire life. And I’m focused on speaking and creating this podcast in order to be able to leverage my time a little bit better, right? And be able to still share kindness in a way that makes sense with the current chapter that I’m in, in my life.

The current chapter of my life is, I’m a brand new mom, and my time is really stretched and limited, I cannot donate 200 plus hours of my time to produce a large scale event for a little while, that doesn’t mean that I’m failing in my mission to spread kindness worldwide at all. That’s where the self-love and kindness comes in, that’s where acknowledging that me speaking at, you know, schools for Career Day is still me doing my mission and spreading it, right? And me doing a beach clean-up that somebody else produced is still you know, doing the work. So, in your current chapter in your life, I invite you to invite some more self-love and kindness and see that you are spreading kindness in your own life every day and you don’t necessarily need the big project, you don’t– you know, I’m not saying that not making time to feed the homeless isn’t important, of course it is. But if your current chapter in your life is focused on this brand new book that you just launched that we’re about to get into, that your current you know, chapter in your life is focused on your three boys raising them to be kind young men, which this book shares oodles of beautiful, you know, stories of how you are instilling kindness in your kids and in your family and seeing them as powerful and enough, right?

[13:04] Caroline: You’re absolutely right.

[13:06] Marly Q: So, I wasn’t trying to be right, was just trying to, you know, share, because I’ve been through this as well. And I think it’s just a practice, I think it’s just a practice of seeing kindness in its everyday expression, in the small things and seeing that as absolutely beautiful and powerful, and enough. With that, I would love to kind of jump into your book, because I know it’s been quite a journey for you to get this book out into the world. I think it is an act of kindness, it’s all the time that you spent into putting, you know, this beautiful story together and getting it out into the world. So, if you wouldn’t mind sharing a little bit about your book, Looking Over the Edge, what’s it about?

[13:45] Caroline: Looking Over the Edge. Well, so this book, actually, I’ve been in the process of writing for a long time and this book was not the book I intended to write. I started writing a book with my father and it was my goal to finish that book and during that time, I found myself struggling to finish that project, and really, really sitting down and trying to get the words out and feeling like it wasn’t coming together. And it was during that time that my husband called me one day and said, you know, “Why don’t we go on a spontaneous road trip to Asheville, North Carolina, for the winter holidays?”, which it would have been two years this winter, so two years, almost to the day that we’re having this podcast, and I hesitated a little bit, but I ended up caving, and we did go on this road trip. And I had no idea when I jumped in that car, what our life was going to look like and how this trip was going to change our story. And it was because of that decision to get in that car and do something spontaneous and fun and different, that this book was born. So, the cliff hanger, if you will, of the book is that while we were driving in North Carolina, there was black ice on the ground, and my husband lost control of the car as we were driving, and all of a sudden, we found ourselves sliding towards the edge of a cliff. And I looked over and I, honest to God, thought that we were going to fall off that cliff. And we didn’t, spoiler alert, we all lived.

[15:24] Marly Q: Yes, you’re here.

[15:25] Caroline: We’re here. But I honestly thought at that moment, that we were going to die. And that was the turning point and that was kind of the culmination and what led me to write this book. But the story came so much before that, we’d been on that we’ve been on that road trip already for four days, and when I tell you what, and you’ve read the book, so you know, the story, it happened for me, the book wrote itself. I didn’t have to do much, right? I just had to put those stories down on paper because I honestly felt like it happened for me, and as a result of that trip and as a result of that culminating moment and all the lessons that I learned from it, I sat down and I said, “Dad, I love you, and I know that we have a book together and I know that it’s going to come out one day, but today, I have to work on this.”. And, and I felt like I just had to. So, I put the project aside, I shelved it, like you like to say, I put my other book on the shelf, and I really committed to writing the story, and I rode that wave, I rode that energy that had been given to me. And what I learned from doing that, was that, and in my opinion, which is one of the biggest lessons in the book, is that we’re always in training. We’re in training for something bigger, and for me, writing that book was training me for the book that I have to write with my dad.

[16:57] Marly Q: That’s exactly what I was thinking.

[16:59] Caroline: I just– I was wasn’t ready then and it was almost like this happened for me and it put me in a position where, it took me away from that project only to bring me back to it. So, I feel like I am more prepared now, and when I write that book with my dad it’s going to be that much better and that much stronger and that much more powerful because I have this book under my belt.

[17:23] Marly Q: Yeah, I love that you just shared that, you know, you just said that you felt that this book basically like wrote itself, right? That it was calling you, I believe that that’s the currency of kindness, right? That’s the tap on the shoulder like, hey, you know, and it’s up to you. It was up to you to decide, “No, no, no, I committed to you know, writing this book with my dad and I’m going to like force myself to finish. I can’t think about this other you know, thing.”, or listening to that call and deciding to step into that currency or tune in to that currency of kindness and make that time to be kind is what it is. Putting this book together and putting this out into the world is a huge act of kindness and putting your dad’s project, your co-project, on the shelf for a moment is also an act of kindness. It’s of self-love and kindness because you had this desire, this currency, this calling to move in a different direction, to make sure that this “wrote itself”, which I know it didn’t, I’m sure it took a huge amount of work and effort to put this book out and to write it, but it gives you the right energy from which to create your next one.

[18:37] Caroline: Yes. And when you say that, about the currency of kindness, and using those words, I’m a big applier. So, when I understand the concept, I know how to apply it. And when you said that, and the way that you’ve described kindness to me, and I will admit that it did take a lot of self-love and kindness to put that project aside because there’s ego attached to that, right? Because it was something that I had not finished, it was something that I had not completed, I felt in a way that I was maybe betraying my dad for a little bit, that’s how I felt. And it did take a lot of compassion to put that aside and listening to my intuition and my gut, that this was the course that I had to follow right now, this was the process that I had to go through. So, it was– it did take a lot of self-compassion and putting aside ego, and I think when you’re talking about kindness, and I don’t know, correct me if I’m wrong, but when you’re talking about kindness, I think part of it is putting aside that ego and not making it so much about you. Now, even though, it’s funny, even though the story was about me, it wasn’t the story I wanted to tell at the time, interestingly. And it is a true story about my family, but I truly felt like I was like, I had– like, I was called to write that story for someone else.

[20:03] Marly Q: Well, I honor you for answering that call and stepping into that current and trusting that the project that you have on the shelf isn’t a dead project, isn’t something that you’re going to leave there on the shelf, it’s something that you’re going to pick up when you’re ready to answer that one, right? And the energy from what you create is everything. So, the energy wasn’t in tune with it when you were first writing it, and that’s why there was some resistance, why it wasn’t flowing, right? Why that currency wasn’t making it easy for you, you said it, this one kind of wrote itself, it was calling you, right? Because when you’re in that “currency of kindness”, it does feel like it’s flowing. It’s guiding you into like that next step, and it feels effortless even though it’s a huge amount of work and effort to put out any kind of book, there was a sense of flowing to it. And I do understand, you know, how sometimes we have our ego, you know, or even our own like self-guilt inflicted, that guilt that kind of keeps us into thinking that we’ve got to focus on this because it’s what we should do, rather than what’s really real for me in this moment and having that self-love and kindness to answer what you really truly want to be working on in this moment.

And another reason why you’re here today is because one of the only people that was reaching out to me to, in essence, holding me accountable to starting my podcast was YOU. You reminded me like three or four different times, whether it was through Instagram or when we would see each other at an event in person you’re like, “Hey, so how’s your podcast coming along?”, and from the moment that I announced I wanted to start a podcast to the moment that it’s actually launching or that it launched, that was a good year and a half in there, and what was I doing within that year and a half? I was transitioning into becoming a new mom and as much I wanted to hold myself accountable for what I said I was going to do and, this call, this desire that I had to start a podcast and to share my message in a bigger way, as much as I wanted to do that, my current chapter in life, my current responsibilities, what was calling my energy was my brand new baby, and my husband and my family. And I had to honor that first and launch my podcast when I’m ready. And now, you know, the energy from which I’m creating is the right one. It feels like it flows, you’re here in my house, and we’re having this interview, right? So, it wasn’t right when I wanted it or when I said I was going to do it, I had to allow myself to feel uncomfortable, my ego to feel uncomfortable with not following through right away with what I said I was going to do by the end of the year, right? It’s like, “Wait, well, who made up that timeline? Who put that pressure on me?” ME. All by myself. So, I also have the power to put that project on the shelf until I’m ready to pick you up because right now, I’m focused on something else and having the self-love and kindness to allow that to be okay, I think is a really huge lesson that I’ve learned in my life. I hear it in your story as well and I think it’s something that’s really relevant and that everybody can take and apply to their life because I think we all go through that.

[23:21] Caroline: And I think it’s relevant in your podcasts, you come from a place where you can express a time to be kind differently because you know what it’s like to not have time anymore, you know what it’s like to be a mom and have to prioritize other things. So, in essence, that year and a half has been training you so that you can relate to people that need to hear your message more.

[23:43] Marly Q: Look at that, right? And going back to your point about you know, it’s not really that everything happens for a reason, it’s that everything happens in order to train you for the next thing, and we need to start learning how to just be appreciative of all of it, even though on the outside it seems like you’re not doing what you’re supposed to be doing, you’re not doing what you said you were going to do you know, you’re not doing enough. Like, all of that noise, even if it’s there–

[24:09] Caroline: Well, and I actually am not a believer of everything happens for a reason. In the sense that I don’t know everything happens for a reason, but what I do know is that everything that happens, happened. And once it happened, then we need to look for the lesson, right? So, it may not have happened for a reason, necessarily, but the fact that it happened is training you for something bigger and therefore, we decided what that looks like.

[24:34] Marly Q: Absolutely. So, coming back to your book and on that topic, I feel that Looking Over the Edge and the story in this book is so valuable, not just for you and your family, and I don’t think that you’ve learned all the lessons that you guys are going to learn from this story. I think there’s so much more in here to unpack. There’s a lot of really beautiful lessons, there’s kindness weaved into this book from start to finish, what I love is that you can read it in an afternoon. I read it in a day in three different chunks with, you know, a year and a half year old baby interrupting me, but I did get to read it so, if I can read it–

[25:05] Caroline: Which I think is admirable.

[25:08] Marly Q: Right? So can you, if I can read it, right? In little chunks, so can you. But it really is an awesome read, a great story, so many beautiful lessons. Where can people buy your book?

[25:18] Caroline: On Amazon

[25:20] Marly Q: On Amazon? Great and where can they check you out and connect with you further?

[25:24] Caroline: Carolinedeposada.com.

[25:26] Marly Q: Awesome. And I know you’re really active on Instagram and you share a lot, you know, about the events that you speak at, and the things that you teach about, and about your family and the lessons within, you know, your own family on your blogs. So, please, if you’re listening, please connect with Caroline de Posada, follow her on Instagram, check out our website and pick up this book for yourself or someone you love, it truly is an awesome gift. Not just the book, but awesome gift to have had you here today. Thank you for joining.

[25:53] Caroline: Thank you for having me.

[25:55] Outro:

I sure hope this interview was as enriching for you as it was for me. Originally, we were just going to talk about her book and there ended up being so many more gold nuggets of wisdom to take away from this episode, don’t you agree? Caroline generously gave me a copy of her book to give away to one of you listening.

To be eligible to WIN this FREE BOOK Giveaway, just follow these three simple steps.

1. Make sure you’ve joined my Kind Qrew
2. Leave a kind review on iTunes
3. Take a screenshot & share it on Instagram tagging me @MarlyQ

Click Amazon affiliate link below to purchase your copy of Looking Over the Edge: A True Story of Fear, Finding Your Way and All The Lessons In Between

This episode teaches us how to find the light & lesson behind everything we experience & reminds us that we all have the power to rise from Loss to Triumph through the power of kindness. We also talk about: 

• How (and why) making time to be kind while experiencing loss is so important
• How forgiveness & kindness are intertwined 
• How to free yourself from the prison of your mind and find the gift and lesson in loss 
• How to (really) be productive with your time right now

SHOW NOTES:

Visit www.SheenaEizmendiz.com

Follow on Instagram @sheena.eizmendiz

Buy Sheena’s Book on Amazon

Path of Emergence: From Loss to Triumph

Click here to join my Kind Qrew for your chance to WIN a FREE SIGNED COPY!

Episode PARKner : Chris Colina Realtor

Interested in sponsoring Time to be Kind with Marly Q.? Click here for PARKnership Opportunities

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hi, I’m Marly Q, and you’re listening to Episode #9 with Sheena Eizmendiz.

Before we introduce our guest, I’m so excited to spotlight this Episode’s PARKner who immediately offered to sponsor our podcast after listening to My Abuela in Miami’s bonus episode #8.

You may or may not know this, but a lot of real estate agents out there work on the “Always Be Closing” method of business. But our PARKner, Chris Colina, redefined the ABC model to mean, “Always Be Caring”. As a veteran, dedicated husband and father of two, Chris understands that buying and selling a home are huge life decisions that you shouldn’t have to make alone. Chris is a service driven PARKner who gives clear guidance, trustworthy information, personal communication and most of all KINDNESS to help you sell or find your next home. To learn more and connect with Chris, visit www.chriscolinarealtor.com or follow him on Instagram @chriscolinarealtor.

We’re so grateful to have people, companies and organizations joining our Kind Qrew and supporting our mission to inspire and ignite kindness worldwide. If you’re interested in exploring PARKnership opportunities, visit www.marlyq.com/sponsor

Today’s guest is definitely someone who Performs Acts of Random Kindness (PARK), and she’s an expert in shifting mindsets. I’m talking about Sheena Eizmendiz, she’s a high-performance leader, corporate trainer and keynote speaker on the topics of emotional intelligence, stress, leadership and positive psychology. As the best-selling author of her own memoir titled Path of Emergence: From Loss to Triumph, Sheena uses her experience of being sentenced to 21 months in a federal prison, for a crime she never committed, as a tool that can help people experiencing times of fear, uncertainty and loss, which so many of us are experiencing today.

In this interview, Sheena not only gives us insight into her powerful story, she teaches us how to find the light and lesson behind everything that we experience. And she reminds us that we all have the power to rise from loss to triumph through the power of kindness. Let’s listen.

Sheena, welcome to the show. Thank you so much for making the time to be kind today.

[02:28] Sheena: Marly, thank you. I’m honored.

[02:30] Marly Q: I feel like you’re such a great example of practicing self-love and kindness and kindness towards others and kindness towards the world. So, you’re like a perfect guest to have on the show.

[02:41] Sheena: Aw, thank you.

[02:42] Marly Q: Just kick us off with your story. I know you wrote your book Path of Emergence: From Loss to Triumph, and in this podcast we really like to highlight superheroes, and I totally see you as a superhero who has been able to create your own path from loss and betrayal almost to finding triumph and success again. And I think you did a lot of that through kindness. So, please share your story with us.

[03:11] Sheena: Thank you. So, back in 2012, I was given, I say now, it was an amazing opportunity, you know, I always believe that challenges are gifts and it’s an opportunity for us to take a really hard and deep look at ourselves and being in a situation where I was pretty much stripped from everything as I knew it, and what I mean by that is, at the time, I had already been in business for 14 years. I was in a very stable and very successful place in my career that I had built all on my own, it really took some time and a lot of obviously, like anything else, you know, trials and errors to get there. I experienced a situation where everything shifted, everything was sort of flipped upside down. I was charged with a federal crime that I had not committed; it was a money crime. It gave me an opportunity because everything as I knew it had changed at the moment to, you know, to really go within myself and question a lot of things. I questioned things outside of me, I questioned things about me, about choices I had made in terms of my personal life, being a single mom pretty much my entire life with two young girls at the time, and, you know, questioned the way that I was showing up in the world, and specifically in my business, I think more than anything in my business.

I definitely was not practicing a lot of kindness towards myself at the time, I was working about 10-12 hour days a day, you know, running a practice with multiple employees, a lot of things going on at the time, a lot of community activities, which I absolutely loved and enjoyed, but I was really at a level of exhaustion and depletion that was just, you know, to the outside world, you couldn’t see it. but internally, I was feeling it. I was definitely feeling it. I was 35. At the time, if I– if my clock is correct, it’s been a few years now, and you know, and I was really pretty much removed from everything. I went to prison, I was sentenced to 21 months, and during my time there, I had an opportunity to show up differently and just practice, I think kindness is such an important and valuable thing, and I had to learn that and kind of rewire myself in learning how to be kind to myself, because I felt that I had been practicing kindness to others, but not so much to myself. So, I was able to do a lot of things that I didn’t have time to do, or, I’ll rephrase that, things that I didn’t look for the time to do them such as, you know, I took yoga, I took an art class, something that I had never done before, you know, I used to run seven miles every day in– we had a track and so, I did a lot of little things that added up, and it really gave myself an opportunity to make different decisions when I was, you know, when I had the opportunity to leave that place, and show up differently, more than anything.

[06:25] Marly Q: And did you see, I mean, I think that that’s, wow, first, that’s not a fly past that incredible story, I think that it’s so relevant right now, so many people may feel that their whole world has crumbled, that they’ve lost so much, so many people right now, with the current health crisis and the pandemic feel an immense sense of loss, loss of certainty, loss of financial stability, loss of a job, loss of relationships or human touch. I mean, I think a lot of people may even feel like they are in jail in their home while they’re being quarantined. You know, not to make a direct comparison but I think that a lot of people can relate to your story and finding or, making the time, like you said, making the time to, “How can I incorporate some more self-love and kindness to get me through this, to get me through a dark time to get me through loss?”.

[07:26] Sheena: Yeah, no doubt. You know, I think that every situation is different and it’s not so much as the situations that we go through, it’s more the way that we digest the situation, the way that we process, right? A circumstance. And loss is loss, you know? There’s no such thing, we can never compare and say, “Well, you know, this is a worse loss than this”, I think loss is loss and it weighs and it brings upon a lot of pain, it, you know, it brings a lot of fear. And so, yes, I think this is a time where, I think as a community and as a– just globally, everyone is experiencing in some way or another, and it’s kind of like you said, whether the loss is through their health, or even loved ones who unfortunately are passing because of this virus, you know, financial loss, job loss, career loss, and then for me, I think the biggest loss of all, is the loss of the self. You know, and I mean that in terms of still being alive, and yet losing yourself, where you lose touch with who you are, touch with reality, and kind of hitting that rock bottom.

[08:35] Marly Q: And I know you help individuals and you help corporations and teams with some of this, right? I mean, it can translate into giving, you know, our listeners and our PARKers who are making the time to be kind right now by listening to this podcast, some tips on how to make time to be kind to themselves, how to stay free of the distractions and the noise that’s going on and then the fear that’s being promoted almost, how to remain calm and focused on themselves and their goals, their family or their business. Do you happen to have any tips to share?

[09:08] Sheena: Yeah, certainly, and I agree with you, fear is viral, right? It’s infectious. So, it’s something that spreads and right now, it’s really easy because I think a lot of us are so, whether we’re glued because of our work or profession, or simply because, you know, it’s sort of a means to connect, we’re all socially in all these platforms, a lot of times a lot of the information that’s out there is very scary, right? It’s very fear inducing. And so, what– some of the things that I can probably offer in terms of some tips would be, you know, we have to begin with ourselves. I think that all kindness begins with us, and a way of not just distracting yourself from it, but of also being, coming from a place of productivity, being really productive with our time right now. It’s about turning inward more than anything else.

A lot of evaluation of who we are, you know, that self-evaluation, that assessment, not coming from a place of judgment or critique, because then you’re not being kind, it’s really more about coming to terms where we are, you know, what are the things that we can look at that all of this situation has brought that is challenging, but yet at the same time can propel us in a direction of growth, and so much positivity. You know, I– a lot of the things that I encounter when I’m reading a lot of these articles or just kind of looking at people’s social media platforms is a lot of negativity, when in fact, I think there definitely is some negative, you know, components to this, such as the health, the, you know, the economic crisis, loss of life, but there’s also a lot of really positive things that come from this. I think if we look for the positive, I always say, you look for the light, you’re going to find it, no matter how dark a room may look, you know? No matter how dark your situation may look.

[11:01] Marly Q: And if you don’t find it, you can always be that spark of light for yourself.

[11:05] Sheena: Yeah, absolutely, yeah. So, it’s starting with ourselves more than anything, taking a good hard look at us and seeing, “How can I show up differently?”, you know, “What can I do today?”, because you can’t change overnight. So, it’s a process, you know, and making real commitments and being very loyal to those commitments and committed to making it part of your reality.

[11:28] Marly Q: I think that right now, you know, for some people, they may be struggling with not feeling productive, right? I know, this is something that for me personally, has it been a big challenge. I sent an email today to my Kind Qrew about this specifically, just being real and grateful and honest, you know, weeks in quarantine, with a 21-month old toddler and trying to figure out how to co-parent and tag team with my husband so that we both try and get some work done and be productive while I’m 21 weeks pregnant, while I’m trying to come to terms with the loss of my business. I mean, as an event producer, my entire business was gone in the span of a week, for the whole year, and really allowing myself to not distract myself from that or just focus on what am I going to do and buy into or allow myself to jump on the train of fear, right? Just so easy to do, and I’m not going to lie to you, I did have a little bit of an emotional breakdown when all of my clients cancelled within a week, like, what am I going to do? I’m pregnant, and I have a baby and what, you know, I definitely had that moment.

And this is where I think the self-love and kindness came in, allowing myself to feel that, not making it wrong, not beating myself up for having that “emotional breakdown”, giving myself the space to feel that fear, and that uncertainty and that sense of loss, and then be in a place where I can ask myself, “Now what? How is this serving me? How can this serve me? How can I find a light in this darkness right now?”, right? And making the time to actually ask those questions and self-reflect, which is what you were sharing, right? Is just, making this time to go inward and see where is the light in this opportunity?

And for me, it’s resulted in a great big light, and while it’s a real challenge and difficult and I can acknowledge that it is, I can also choose to focus my energy on what can I control? What can I create now? How is this loss shifting me into a possible triumph, even if I can’t see it yet? Right? I’m now, for the first time ever offering virtual yoga classes, I just finished teaching one right now before jumping on this interview. I started my podcast which has been on a shelf for three plus years. I’m like, “Now’s the time to get it done.”, and feeling you know, uncomfortable and scared all along the way, but allowing myself, the kindness to feel that and move forward at the same time. And that’s how I interpret your tip and what you just shared, and how you created your own path from loss to triumph, right? Is through allowing yourself to sit in that darkness and sit in that cell, literally, in your cell and say, “What can I do for myself to refine myself?”, you take up yoga, you take up reading, you take up, you know other things that are positive and productive to move you forward.

[14:30] Sheena: Absolutely Marly. And, you know, and I think when we speak even of productivity, because a lot of times I know that can bring upon a lot of pressure, especially in times like these where, you know, we’re so emotional and then some days we wake up and we want to conquer the world, right? We have like this to-do list and all these goals and we want to tackle all of them, and we have all this energy and then there’s other days where it’s totally the contrary. We are feeling maybe bummed out, we’re feeling tired, we’re feeling like we have no energy, we’re kind of low in– our moods are low or, you know, all these different things are happening. I think that productivity is very relative, and even, I think everything adds up at the end of the day. So, even if the steps towards being productive are small, or if we pause, and like you said, just pausing is so important. You know, there’s that moment where in order for you to move forward, maybe later on tomorrow, it means you need to just sit and maybe watch TV or do nothing, then by all means, you need to honor that, we all need to honor that. It doesn’t mean that because you did that you have set yourself back, or you’re not being productive, that is a way of you being productive; you’re producing. What is productivity at the end of the day? It’s producing, so you’re producing a state of mind that will ultimately give you a better result. And perhaps the next day when you wake up, you’re going to feel a lot better and now you can tackle other things from a different space and a different energy.

[16:00] Marly Q: Absolutely, 100%. That was the essence of what I was trying to share, you did it so much more succinctly than I did. Thank you, Sheena. Just reminding ourselves we’re doing the best we can, right? And if we start with that acknowledgement, then we stop being so hard on ourselves, we can show ourselves some more compassion, and humility, right? That we don’t have control over many things happening right now. But what we do have control over is how we are showing up for ourselves and for the people we interact with and for the world, and we can always make time to be kind, which is the whole essence of this podcast and what we’re talking about. Now, I think that’s what your book teaches, your book teaches that you don’t really control anything, right?

[16:46] Sheena: We don’t control anything. We think we do. We’d love to control and listen, this is coming from someone who, you know if I give get to–

[16:54] Marly Q: Who loves to control.

[16:56] Sheena: I love to control. My family will, you know, tell you, they will attest to that, they will say that I am a control freak. But in actuality, I know that it’s really just part of the illusion and my ego, trying to control situations, you know, trying to be in the driver’s seat all the time, leading, because I’m such a believer, you know, in leading that I try to control more than I can handle. But, you know, in reality, I know that we don’t control anything and that the more we try to control, the less out of control we actually become.

[17:30] Marly Q: Yes, absolutely. Would you mind, I know you wouldn’t want to give, you know, the book away. I know it’s a memoir, and it’s, you know, your story. But would you like to share any little part of your path of emergence with us?

[17:44] Sheena: Sure. So, I think that as a whole, the intention of writing the book, and I did write the book while I was going through the journey, through the process, meaning, you know, while I was incarcerated, I wrote the core of the book and then, you know, once I was released, I worked on the editing and whatnot, and I will tell you, it was a love and hate relationship, that is the best way to describe it. There was sort of this bitter sweetness to the book, even to the point where I published it and I made bestseller list, I still was kind of struggling with that dynamic and relationship with the book because I do believe we have relationships with everything and anything in life. And so, there was this really profound relationship with the book, the book was really intended, at the time that I was writing it, it was really more documenting a lot of the things that I was seeing within the justice system, a lot of things that I felt were necessary for my readers, my audience to become aware of and sort of awakened, right? Because I think we have all of these sorts of misconceptions about people who go to prison or people who are charged with crimes. And so, I kind of wrote the book at the beginning with that intention, and then found myself in the writing of the book, that it was so much more than my story or even the collection of stories of the people whom I did interview while I was there, because I was trying to collect their stories and, you know what brought them there, what their lives, you know, we’re like, and so forth. It really became more about a tool or sort of a set of tools to not only help, you know, identify how we’re co-creators of everything that happens to us, right? Nothing happens by coincidence, there’s so much purpose, even if at the moment we don’t see it, but also in the power of forgiveness.

You know, and I think forgiveness and kindness is sort of intertwined because you can’t truly be kind if you don’t forgive and I think all forgiveness really begins with ourselves. So, my book really was, if I could kind of just pinpoint more than anything, it really was more about forgiveness, because I did spend my time there with the main person involved in my case, so in sharing time with her, because I had worked prior to actually self-surrendering, which is basically just, you know, turning myself in, and I had to plead guilty because I had no choice, to either plead guilty and serve 21 months, or I was facing 30 years in prison. So, being able to share that space with her, that time, really gave me an incredible, profound, I think, more like realization or almost like an epiphany in how powerful forgiveness is because I had completely forgiven her for kind of what led us to be there in the first place. And I think that, you know, in completing the book, that really was my message, it was about, you know, we– prison isn’t a place that we go to, it’s really a place that we live in, primarily inside our own heads. So, it’s not really a place you go to, it’s a state of mind more than anything.

[21:00] Marly Q: Right. That’s how we started the conversation, right? I feel like so many people might, you know, relate even if they’ve never stepped foot into an actual jail cell, you’re living in a cell and in a prison of your own mind many times and you’re not even aware of it.

[21:15] Sheena: Yeah, that’s really the strongest and most difficult confinement that we can live in. And then really, I wrote the book to help people, you know, it ended up being this sort of an idea that I just unfolded into, you know, this book, “Maybe, I don’t know, even if it just helps one person, it can help someone you know, look at their lives, look at whatever situation they’re going through, this situation for that matter, and even assessing whatever they want to label as a loss, and looking deeper.”, you know, and really coming from a place of forgiveness and acceptance and looking at the purpose. You know, I think even for you, as you just shared earlier, what incredible opportunity, right? That you’ve had that because a good part of your business completely, let’s just say for the sake of it, collapsed on you, right? At the beginning of this pandemic, you had all these maybe cancellations, all these things that happened, gave you an opportunity to now be able to put out, you know, this amazing podcast, and probably attend to other things, even in your own personal life and enjoy your pregnancy even more than when we’re just tied to the hamster wheel and, you know, going from project to project and client to client and goal to goal.

[22:27] Marly Q: Yeah, thank you so much for saying that and bringing that up, because it was not an automatic thing. I had to intentionally go there, it is a practice, right? It’s a practice. So, people think because I, you know, I preach the power of kindness that I just, you know, wake up, you know, with this superpower. No, I exercise it, we get stronger the more we practice it, and the one person that we need to practice it the most with is ourselves, from that place, we have the power to be the spark of kindness for our immediate family, for our– the people that we work with, the people that we interact with on a daily basis, the stranger on the street, and the world, the planet and animals, it’s–everybody benefits if we turn that inward, and you’re just such a such a shining example of that. I really respect and admire you a lot before I even knew–

[23:26] Sheena: Thank you my friend. The feeling is mutual.

[23:30] Marly Q: And it was before I even knew like, the depth of your story and before you came out with your book, I already had that opinion and after, you know, your book, and that vulnerability, and just that courage, it’s just on a whole other level. So, I really wanted to bring you on to the show. I appreciate you offering and always making yourself available to make the time for, not just me, but for others. I’m going to include the link to your website, I know that you coach people and you give out tips, you know, for people to get through these stressful times. Is there anything else that you’d like to share with our PARKers listening on how to connect with you or or how to, you know, how to get some of the Sheena love?

[24:10] Sheena: Definitely appreciate you sharing the website. I’m constantly trying to develop things where people can download, there’s a lot of free audios that they can download, there’s several for stress right now, fear, self-esteem, it’s on my website.

[24:28] Marly Q: www.sheenaeizmendiz.com, and I know it’s a beautifully complicated name so, I will spell that for people.

[24:36] Sheena: You got it, you got it. You know, there’s just a couple of things there that they can definitely, I think if anything just to offer support during these times, also my Instagram. I love coming up with just different challenges, different things, whether it’s a 21-day journaling challenge or gratitude challenge, things that, just try to offer support, I think more than anything and encouragement and help people get through these times because I completely understand where everyone is at because we’re all going through it together. There’s no such thing as, you know, me, myself and I, this is a “we” thing.

[25:11] Marly Q: It is such a “we” thing. Yes.

[25:14] Sheena: It is, which makes it great. I think that’s one of the things that we can check off and say, you know, what’s a really positive thing about this, is that we’ve become we and we’re no longer me. I think that in itself is just so incredible.

[25:26] Marly Q: Absolutely. You know, I’m all about the we, #wePARK folks, #wePARK. It is all about the we, I truly believe it is the only way we’re going to change the world is by coming together and as a collective, being more kind to ourselves, each other and this world. And yes, the current times that we’re living in can be fearful and uncertain and filled with loss and there’s also a lot of hope in what we’re experiencing if you look for it. And your book is just a shining example of that, we will definitely include links for people to check it out and purchase it on Amazon, Path to Emergence: From Lost to Triumph, and I’ll include your website and your Instagram as well for people to connect and just receive some of your wisdom and your kindness because you’ve got a whole lot of it, my friend. Thank you for taking the time to be kind.

[26:19] Sheena: Thank you. My pleasure.

[26:21] Outro:

I hope you enjoyed today’s episode and found it as enlightening as I did. Sheena was so kind and generous to give us a signed copy of her book to give away to one of you listening, and believe me, you want to read this book!

To be eligible to WIN this FREE BOOK Giveaway, just follow these three simple steps.

1. Make sure you’ve joined my Kind Qrew
2. Leave a kind review on iTunes
3. Take a screenshot & share it on Instagram tagging me @MarlyQ

Inspired by our mission to ignite kindness worldwide, The Cuban Laverne & Chur-Lee, who make up the hilarious sketch comedy duo “My Abuela in Miami”, offered to become our first official PARKner! ⁣

⁣⁣

⁣What’s a PARKner, you ask? Great Question!

Listen to this BONUS EPISODE to find out and get ready to enrich your day with inspiration, laughter & joy for celebrating life – even in the midst of loss.

SHOW NOTES:

Episode PARKner & Featured Guest:

My Abuela in Miami

Visit MyAbuelainMiami.com to sign up to their email list for a FREE GIFT and check out My Abuela’s 12 Days of Christmas & other hilarious videos

Interested in sponsoring Time to be Kind with Marly Q.? Click here for PARKnership Opportunities

TRANSCRIPTION:

Hola. I’m Marly Q and welcome to Episode #8. I’m so excited to share this bonus episode today because we’re celebrating our podcast’s one month-versary, can you believe it?

I’ve got a big announcement and not one but two very special guests to help us celebrate today. Joining us is the Cuban “Laverne and Chur-Lee”, the hilarious grandmother granddaughter duo who star in a sketch comedy series called My Abuela in Miami.

I should clarify, she’s not really my biological grandma, but she’s become my abuela and hopefully yours too by the end of the episode. She’s actually my best friend’s grandma who after listening to our show was inspired to reach out to me and offered to sponsor our podcast. That’s our big announcement my friends. Just one month into our journey together we have our very first podcast PARKner!

And what’s a PARKner? Great question!

Way more than a sponsorship of dollars, we’re looking to create lasting PARKnerships with people, companies and organizations who give the currency of kindness. Our PARKners, not only generously contribute monetary resources to support our podcast, they also live our mission to inspire and ignite kindness worldwide.

Which is why today I’m so excited to make time to be kind with My Abuela in Miami to celebrate our first podcast PARKnership and invite you to consider becoming a podcast PARKner too. If you’re interested, just visit marlyQ.com/parknerships and connect with me because I’d love to explore PARKnership opportunities with you too!

So, without any further ado, allow me to introduce our two special guests today. My Abuela in Miami stars, Louise Alvarez, she was born in Havana, Cuba and fled to New York when she was only 16 years old. She married her love and had three children before moving to Miami with her growing family, which now includes grandchildren and great grandkids too.

Monique Alvarez is the “Chur-Lee” to her grandma’s “Laverne”. She’s a classically trained actress, writer and filmmaker from New York who grew up on cortaditos and pan Cubano in Hialeah Florida, in the heart of Miami, where we both went to high school together and have been best friends since. I hope you’re ready to laugh, be inspired, and let My Abuela in Miami enrich your day with the currency of kindness. Let’s listen.

[02:32] Marly Q: So, just thank you so much for making the time to be kind today and just sharing some kindness and positive energy with me and our PARKers listening today. I’m just so happy to have you both on the line because I think you have such a beautiful story to share and I just kind of want to jump right into it. Who are Laverne and Chur-Lee? And how did My Abuela in Miami come to be?

[02:59] Monique: Well, first we want to say thank you for having us here because your ongoing spreading of kindness, you know, has always come from such a genuine place, and building relationships with our community, with our family with friends and so, that’s kind of very similar to what the inspiration was that started my and my grandma’s shenanigans of being Laverne and Chur-Lee. We just kind of wanted to celebrate joy and celebrate that it’s never too late to go have fun. We wanted to celebrate our community, you know, my grandma came from Cuba, and long story short, landed in New York City, and then became a resident of Hialeah for 45 years where my dad and his brothers were raised, and Hialeah, Florida is where me and my siblings were raised. And so, it’s a place that is, it’s such a part of our life story. You know, when it all started Marly?

[03:58] Marly Q: What was that? That’s what I want to get start with, what was that spark of inspiration that started these shenanigans?

[04:03] Monique: Well, it was my beautiful grandpa Charles Alvarez, grandma’s late husband, who passed December 2015. And I– you know, he lived such an amazing, amazing, great, long life, what a joyful life he lived and is in our hearts present every day. But I remember that when I went back to Miami, you know, when it happened, when grandpa passed, and I stayed with grandma, and that was our first Christmas together, starting our new journey really. And I remember sitting in grandma’s room and I slept over her house, and we sat there on the twin beds and grandma was next to me on her bed and I was sitting on the bed where grand pop used to sleep, and we looked at each other, and we said, “What now Laverne?”, and she goes, “I don’t know Chur-Lee.”, and we said we should go put some rollers in her hair and go have some scotch and ginger ale in the living room and watch some Laverne and Chur-Lee.

[05:10] Louise: Oh, my goodness, yes, you cannot put it any better.

[05:17] Marly Q: Oh, my goodness. Well, you started off by saying how, you know, the whole purpose of My Abuela in Miami series was to celebrate life and spread joy, and what a beautiful acknowledgment of that. And in that moment when there’s sadness and there’s grief, to be able to share that moment and that spark of just, joy and celebrating life, I am so inspired by that.

[05:40] Monique: So true, huh Grandma?

[05:42] Louise: Yes, that’s right. And Monique, this one inspired me because she’s such a great granddaughter, and this, doing what we did, it was some of fun, and at the same time, that was something that she wanted to do.

[06:02] Monique: And you know when it happened organically Marly, like it’s exactly what– it’s exactly what the three of– we’re saying the same thing but what you said about, you know, in a moment of grief is when we can find great joy, and we held on to each other, huh grandma? We said, we’re going to get through this together, and it gave us a reason to keep– because grand pop always liked celebrating life, you know, if there’s a problem, turn the music on and dance and deal with it, but dance, and we just, it was her– can I say the beginning of a new chapter in your life? Huh, Grandma?

[06:38] Louise: Yes. I will say yes, especially at my age.

[06:43] Marly Q: Well, I think what you just mentioned right now, Louise, you know, especially at your age, I think that many people that are listening, and that can relate with family members, whether it be their mom or their grandma, sometimes when they reach a certain age, they start to think you know, that they’re too old to start something new, maybe when there is death and passing they think that you know, “Am I ever going to find joy and happiness again? And you know, do I deserve to have this new chapter in my life?”, and that is super inspiring to me and it’s I’m not about your age, right?

[07:17] Louise: Yes, that’s right. I forgot about my age because of something that I was doing with my granddaughter that I love very much, and that was fun, and we accomplished everything we wanted to do. And I never thought that I can do it at my age, but I really enjoy it, and Monique was because of all that.

[07:37] Marly Q: If you don’t mind sharing, what is your age? Is that okay, if I ask directly?

[07:42] Louise: Well, I tell you, please, just between you and I–

[07:49] Monique: No Grandma, this is going on the air.

[07:52] Louise: Oh, this is going on the– Oh, my God, can I lie? Listen, I’m 91 years old.

[08:03] Marly Q: No, I don’t believe it.

[08:07] Louise: I don’t believe it myself and I’m very– if I can feel like I feel at this age, I think I can be 100 but don’t tell anybody please. Too late.

[08:26] Marly Q: I’m sorry I put you on the spot. But honestly, the reason what I did is because I feel that it is so awesome and inspiring. Sometimes, not everybody has a you know, the blessing and the privilege that Monique does to have a grandmother at your age that is such a positive role model at your age. Sometimes when we think of old people or our senior citizens, we think of you know, “Oh, the little old lady that’s, you know, like, in her house not doing anything.”

[08:55] Louise: No, no, no, no little old lady here.

[08:56] Marly Q: Exactly, and that’s why wanted to share it because it’s so important to have a positive role model and when I think of you know, who I would like to be like when I hit 91 years old, it’s going to be you, it’s going to be you Louise.

[09:13] Louise: Well, I don’t feel my age, I still have all my mind and everything. I think I am blessed in having to, at my age, doing what I did with Monique, it’s incredible, and I enjoyed every minute let me tell you.

[09:31] Monique: What we did– we decided to put on, I mean to take it back for a moment you said like, what inspired the concept of grandma and I running around making sketch comedy videos and funny videos, and it was you know, grandpa passed and then a few years, we just wanted to celebrate the moment, celebrate life. So, her showbiz, her entertainer came out and I would just be there next to her with my camera, on my iPhone, recording a lot of these hilarious moments and the most mundane things that we’d be doing around Miami, I would end up capturing and it would be a lot of fun.

So, then November of 2019, we decided that we were going to make a series of sketch comedy videos to celebrate exactly what grandma is saying, right? That saying, being young is a state of heart, it’s a state of mind, she can speak better to that than I can. But that really was this joie de vivre, this seizing the moment was really what inspired us to like, go make these sketch comedy videos and just to have some fun and shoot some funny stuff guerilla-style.

[10:45] Louise: And I tell you, I have never had so much fun that I did those five days, that’s what I can tell you. I was myself in, just, changing clothes in a room and running and doing so much in the middle of the street, she and I, dressed up. Let me tell you, oh my god, I have never had so much fun in my own life.

[11:12] Monique: What was the schedule? Do you remember what the schedule was like Grandma? We would wake up, it was serious work, we would wake up at 6AM, get ready, Marly’s, little sister, Melanie Quincoces was our cinematographer.

[11:23] Louise: Oh my gosh, she was great, that girl.

[11:27] Monique: And we would wake up at 6AM and get there highly 8:00, we’d be shooting till 6:00, 7:00, changing locations from the arts district to Hollywood Boulevard, you know–

[11:39] Louise: Running all over the place.

[11:42] Monique: Running everywhere. We would– what was that– like, I remember grandma woke up like on the third of our six shooting days, and she says, “I think I broke my toe but no matter, that’s okay. I can still walk, let’s keep having fun.”

[12:00] Louise: I have never had so much fun in my young age.

[12:05] Marly Q: I love that so much. How can people check out these videos and bring some spark of joy in their life today?

[12:13] Monique: Myabuelainmiami.com. And while she’s My Abuela, I will share my abuela with you, Louise Alvarez.

[12:22] Marly Q: Oh, I feel like she’s my abuela. She’s everybody’s abuela.

[12:27] Monique: Grandma, you know what was amazing? Marly, you know what we discovered along this journey? Because I just was like, “Grandma, you’re hilarious, you’re a comedian.”, and then she says, “Oh, well, you know, I used to act in New York, a bit.”, and then she revealed to me this in a sense, huh Grandma? This lifelong dream of being an entertainer.

[12:48] Louise: Yes, yes.

[12:50] Marly Q: So, were you inspired in a way because you know, your granddaughter, Monique is an actress and a producer, and story writer. So, how cool was it for you to have that experience all these years later, to have your granddaughter be the spark of you being able to kind of relive this dream that you had? How was that for you?

[13:11] Louise: Oh, incredible. First, I didn’t expect it, and you know, like everything came out, every day is very natural, we just went along, and the things that Monique did, and has helped me to do, that was incredible. I never thought I was going to stay in the middle of the street, stop the car and talk to Monique like, the people were looking at us, they were laughing, they were having fun. This was not work, this was fun from day one. So, I enjoyed every bit and Monique is the cause of all that because she was the one guiding us in like, I said, we were dancing in the middle of the street, on top of what was there, and the cars start honking because we were making noise and we start running.

[13:56] Monique: In Abuela’s 12 Days of Christmas starring Ryan Rodriguez, that made the cover of the Miami Herald, that was hilarious.

[14:04] Marly Q: That one, I truly enjoyed that video. I enjoyed that video greatly, being that I’m also Hialeah, and I know those streets, and Ryan Rodriguez is one of my very best friends as well. I truly enjoyed the 12 Days of Christmas, that was really fun. And now, you’re a star and you’re on my podcast, think kindness and positivity, and I’m so grateful. Is this your first zoom experience? Is this your first time being on a podcast interview?

[14:37] Louise: Oh, yes, yes. Well, I’ve been there but I was younger.

[14:41] Monique: She’s talking about the podcast now, Zoom.

[14:44] Marly Q: Yeah. So, right now, Louise, you are on a podcast which is going to be reaching an audience, potentially a worldwide audience, who will tune in and listen to this. In essence, it’s kind of like a radio station, if you will, but that you can listen to–

[14:59] Louise: Oh, I see. I understand what you’re saying. Yes, this is great.

[15:03] Marly Q: Yeah, so, you’re a guest on my podcast, and not only are you a guest on my podcast, you and Monique are my very first PARKners!

[15:15] Louise: Thank you so much to choose us to do that. I love it.

[15:23] Marly Q: Thank you for choosing me. And Monique, first, thank you, so much gratitude for you reaching out to me and supporting my podcast and supporting me and everything that I’ve done for all these years that we’ve known each other. I know that we are each other’s biggest fans and we support everything that we do. But this in particular, this podcast was a brand new and kind of scary venture for me. In essence, it was a calling that I decided to pursue, a dream, if you will, that I didn’t even know I had, is to start this podcast. So, when Monique reached out to me and offered to be our first sponsor for the podcast, it truly made me emotional and it brought me to tears and I’m not going to blame it on my pregnancy, it wasn’t hormone tears; it was true and genuine, just gratitude. So, I’m really thankful for your support and for you guys being this bonus episode where we get to share some fun and positivity with everybody listening.

[16:16] Louise: Well, thank you. Thank you so much. We are so happy that we can do that for you and for us because this moment too is incredible, and I have so much fun with Monique and I know that you’re very good friend of Monique. So, you know, whatever we can do.

[16:32] Monique: And, that’s exactly it. It’s– I remember when you first told me about wanting to do this podcast and it was something that would be a real adventure to take on, right? You get on that boat and you have your compass, but you’re not really sure what you’re going to find along the way, and then you go anyway. I just think that it’s amazing. Just the word kindness, right? And the mission of spreading kindness. What better way to communicate that than through people’s individual stories and how they’re doing that, how they are living the spreading of kindness through what they do and in different ways. I think when anyone just follows their calling, that is spreading love, anything that is coming from a place of love, gives love, you know. You be the light; you spark the light in others. To me, your podcast and the spreading of kindness is what I feel grandma does in these videos too. She’s sharing her love; it just brings joy to one’s heart and we could use a lot of that these days.

[17:30] Louise: You cannot put it any better way.

[17:33] Marly Q: In these times that we’re experiencing worldwide, this health crisis, this time of quarantine, so many of us, are quarantine maybe at home with our families, but some of us are quarantined alone, and I know that you’re quarantined alone, and I’d love to hear just your experience as to how you are keeping yourself positive during this time.

[17:55] Louise: Well, first of all, I hear from my kids every day, the three of them call me. And I got involved because of my sister, soap operas, and believe it or not, that all I’m doing, watching all day, and they and so nice. And so, that made me forget what’s going on because I’m happy, I’m usually happy anyway, but listen for my kids every day and watching these soap operas, I don’t need anything else.

[18:26] Marly Q: The month of May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and I’m just so grateful that we’re having this conversation right now because some people have a practice of keeping their mental health healthy, right? And I think you have, the reason that it sounds that it comes so naturally to you is because you have a practice of keeping your mental health healthy. And for those people listening who may not have an aware or a purposeful practice of keeping themselves mentally healthy, I think that what you shared is very important, is asking or making it known that you know what? Phone calls throughout the day from people that you love and care about you is really important to mental health, would you agree?

[19:07] Louise: Right. Yes. Oh, definitely. And watching something nice is nice too. I don’t want to listen to the news, I watch the soap opera, they’re very funny, they’re very nice. And like I said, I’m pretty positive, I have to be, and as long as I hear from my kids, I’m fine.

[19:24] Monique: And people could also watch you in some funny videos on My Abuela in Miami.

[19:30] Marly Q: Exactly. That’s exactly right, that’s why this is being offered as a bonus episode in my podcast so that while people are quarantined, while people are maybe consuming more negative news, and they should, here’s an opportunity to have a spark of kindness, to have a spark of positivity and to watch something that’s going to make you laugh, because laughing is healthy for you.

[19:53] Monique: And I love that people can take this and what I love about your podcast is that anyone can be the spark, people can take and they can be the spark that ignites joy and kindness in the hearts of someone they love just by maybe picking up the phone and saying, “Hey, how you doing? Let’s FaceTime, let’s WhatsApp, let’s make a home video, let’s use our iPhones, let’s express ourselves.”. It’s amazing because anyone can make a positive contribution.

To be a PARKner feels like a no brainer. I mean, for companies, individuals, organizations, entities, to be able to sponsor positive programming, that’s just the direction that we’re headed in, and it makes such a huge impact on a person to person level. So, I’m so happy that we got to join forces.

[20:41] Marly Q: Thank you both so much. I’m giving you a big, big virtual hug from our virtual living room here where we are together. Thank you for making the time to be kind today. Thank you for sponsoring our podcast and bringing– being that light and that spark of joy for everyone listening today. Big hugs.

[20:59] Monique: Right on. Thank you for having us.

[21:01] Louise: Okay. Bye-bye.

[21:04] Outro:

That was so much fun. I hope you enjoyed this interview as much as I did!

To connect with My Abuela in Miami just visit marlyq.com/8 for this episode’s show notes with the links to connect with My Abuela, and watch the 12 Days of Christmas video and others which will surely spark laughter and make you want to adopt My Abuela too.

How can you access your calm center, when there’s so much noise outside of us?

How can we be more mindful in everyday life?

What are the direct benefits of life coaching and empowering self-love & kindness?

For answers to these Q’s and (so much) more, listen to today’s enlightening interview with Jasmin Terrany who teaches people how to create a calm & nurturing space within which we can always access & return

SHOW NOTES:

JOIN Stress Less & Love More: 14-Day Reflection Challenge

Check out Jasmin Terrany’s Books:

Extraordinary Mommy

Extraordinary You: Master your Feelings, Master your Life

Follow on Instagram @jasmin_terrany 

Interested in sponsoring Time to be Kind with Marly Q.? Click here for PARKnership Opportunities

TRANSCRIPTION:

Marly Q: Hi PARKer. I’m Marly Q and welcome to Episode #7 with Jasmin Terrany.

Our guest today is a PARKer who helps people learn how to be calm amidst chaos.

Jasmin Terrany is the inventor of life therapy, a combination of psychotherapy and coaching, plus mindfulness and meditation. She holds two master’s degrees from Columbia University, she’s written two books and has been featured on numerous media outlets, including CNN, PBS, Parents Magazine, and has even hosted an advice show in addition to her own YouTube channel. Jasmin is an inspiration to me, not only because she’s successful in business, but more so because she’s successful in her personal life as a dedicated wife and mom of two kids who knows how to create a loving and calm home amidst any chaos going on in the world. For the past 13 years through her virtual coaching practice, Jasmin helps high achievers be successful in their personal lives by teaching people how to love better, and that’s precisely why she’s here with us today, to teach us all how to be better at loving ourselves.

[01:18] Alright, Jasmin, welcome to the show. Thank you so much for making the time to be kind with me on our PARKers today.

[01:25] Jasmin: Of course, thank you so much for having me; I’m honored to be here.

[01:29] Marly Q: I know you’re such a busy mommy to your precious children, Zen and Liv, and we’re both at home, quarantined due to this COVID-19. So, I really appreciate you squeezing this in because I wanted to have this conversation with you and share with our listeners, just in service. I think so many people are in need of your help. There’s so much that you can offer as a life therapist, as a psychotherapist, with your coaching, with your mindfulness, with your meditation, with this awesome 14-day challenge that you invited me to be a part of and I’m really been enjoying. So, we can just dive into the conversation. Why don’t you first tell me, if you remember how we’ve connected and stayed connected through all these years? And what inspired you to reach out to me after all this time and invite me to your 14-day challenge? Tell me about it.

[02:24] Jasmin: Ooh, that’s a good question. Well, we met at the Women’s Success Summit, right? And I was a speaker and we were both on the board and then I think we’ve just kind of been in and out for the last, how many years ago is that? It’s got to be at least like, eight years ago.

[02:40] Marly Q: Right. About eight or nine years ago.

[02:41] Jasmin: Yeah. And so, you know, you’re always in– the periphery of my life being another person committed to kindness and love and being the light. And so, I created this 14-day mommy challenge for all of us mommies who are quarantined at home with their children and how to deal with the stress and the anxiety and money and the kids and all these things. But really, it’s how do you return to the calm? You know, how do you find that space within yourself to be okay amidst all the chaos? And so, I just created this challenge and invited the world. So, you’re part of my world. So, that’s how you got into it.

[03:26] Marly Q: It’s meant to be of service. So, sometimes when we hear, you know, 14-day challenge, we’re like, “Ugh, you know, right now, I don’t need something else to do. I don’t, you know, I have enough or.”, right?

[03:37] Jasmin: Right. That’s a really good point. Yeah, no, this is– we take a moment each day to commit to ourselves to pause, you know, whether it’s a minute or 10 minutes or five minutes, or whatever, just, that when we’re going, going, going, going going, we’re constantly reacting. And so, the idea is like, how do you pause? How do you recenter? How do you come from a more divinely connected space so that we’re interacting with particularly our children from the most loving place that we can, you know? When we’re all stressed out and frazzled, and there’s so much noise outside of us, inside of us is, how do you return to that center? So, it’s not supposed to be some like, you know, go go, go go go kind of challenge and you know, hold yourself accountable, it’s not like that at all. It’s really the intention is just, here are some prompts, three questions a day to just sit, to be with yourself, to breathe and to reflect and to recenter yourself.

[04:26] Marly Q: Well, you mentioned something really beautiful. I love that your whole practice, basically, you specialize in helping people love better, love themselves better, love others better, pour love into their families and their kids, but also the community and the world at large, right? So, one of the questions that I’d love to get your insight on is, why do you believe that now is the time to be kind to ourselves, others and the world?

[04:50] Jasmin: Well, you know, a lot of people think of the word love as like some like sticky thing like, “Oh, I love it. I want it. I need it.”, you know? And to me the word love is really an unconditional acceptance, which is like an open hand, you know, instead of like holding on to something with like tight fist, it’s like an open hand, letting things come in and things come out. And to me the idea of loving yourself is being able to accept your fullness, your wholeness, that we have all these amazing parts of ourselves, and we’ve also got these pains, darkness, challenges, kind of like the yin and yang of our planet, right? It’s not always a sunny day, there’s also stormy weather, and the same goes for inside of us. And so, our practice is learning how to create that space to allow that duality to exist within us, and to let our wholeness be enough and to see that as our perfection; the same way that our planet is perfect because if it was always a sunny day, it wouldn’t function, is also understanding that our pain and our fears and our challenges and our anxiety and all these things inside of us are also part of our perfection. Our job is to learn how to handle it and take care of it, and part of that is becoming a loving parent to that pain. And when you talk about kindness, it’s really being kind to your pain, being kind to your fears, being kind to your darkness, and creating a different relationship with it, rather than letting it take over you and being in charge, or pushing it away and saying, “I hate you, and I’m not listening to you.”, but it’s really being kind to all of you. And to me, that love, and acceptance is what we all need for ourselves because when we can do it for ourselves, is then when we can do it for each other. But the way that we love our kids and the way that we love our spouse is largely dependent on the way that we love ourselves or don’t love ourselves, and that’s where the spiral or the ripple effect continues. So, I really believe, particularly with moms, that if we can be doing this kind of work, then it has an impact globally because we’re affecting our children.

[06:54] Marly Q: Absolutely. And I love the way that you put that, you know, how we can practice becoming loving parents to our fears, how we can practice, I mean, creating a relationship with them. I know in one of your books, the one that you gave me while I was pregnant, before I gave birth to Jude, was Extraordinary Mommy, it’s this is loving guide to mastering life’s most important job, and one of the secrets that you share in the book was basically this, right? How to, in essence, become aware of what, you know, the fears and the doubts and anxiety that we might be experiencing, and I don’t want to make it so specific in this conversation as just in parenthood or in motherhood, but just in our current world, what we are all currently experiencing globally, it applies, right? So, it’s not just in parenthood, but in your– in this current situation, and in life, right?

[07:47] Jasmin: Well, and I think that’s the biggest realization that I keep having over and over, right? Is that, we have no control, you know, and I really believe that life gives us exactly what we need to wake up, and that we become very controlling, and we think that we have control, and we think we have control over the thoughts, we think we have control over our feelings, we think that we have control over our circumstances, we think we have control over money, we think we have control over everything, right? And on some level, we have, but it’s really been an illusion. And now, all of a sudden, we’re being faced with the fact that we really legitimately don’t have control, we have no idea what’s going to happen, and now, we have to deal with ourselves, right? We have to deal with the fear of not having control, we need to deal with all the anxiety that comes from not having this illusion of control anymore. And I think that this is just a huge reminder of how to live our lives in general. You know, I think the reason for the book was because my Extraordinary Mommy died suddenly in a car accident, right? So, one day she was here and one day she wasn’t, and I was really faced with the fact that this life is– we have no control over it, anything can happen in any moment. And I think that when we have– that we have such a fear of mortality, that it like, makes us crazy when we think that, “Oh my god, we’re going to die.”, right? But if we can live with that awareness that yes, we are going to die and we don’t know when and we don’t know how but if we can live with it, with that awareness close enough to our consciousness that it helps us live more fully, it helps us enjoy our moments more, it helps us be more grateful because we see that we have no control and therefore we get to cherish and be alive and breathe and base our success on our ability to be present and live more than whatever it is that we’re focusing on for some future time.

[09:37] Marly Q: Absolutely, it goes back to how we started this conversation about acceptance; it is an inevitable part of life, is life and death, right? So, the more that we can be kind with that and accept it, the less scary it becomes. So, I just, I love how you raise that, I love how you just give insight not just in the book but you’ve been through, you know, your your personal practice when you’re helping people one on one, just kind of face this and even name the fears, right? And just from a place of love and kindness and acceptance, like you would with a child and help them understand that this is what you’re just feeling right now, it’s not who you are, it doesn’t define, you know, you or the rest of your life. It’s just what we’re currently going through and what we have to face, and that allows us to bring the attention inward, rather than pointing outward to you know, “This is your fault.”, or pointing like blame or you know, like, “The government needs to fix this somehow.”. No, it’s like, “Wait.”, that does give you some sense of like ownership or quote unquote, control over yourself.

[10:32] Jasmin: Exactly. And that’s really the only thing we can do when we have no control over circumstances is, start to look within, “How is this my gift? How am I supposed to be learning right now? What is it? If I were to assume that life is happening for me, instead of to me, then what is it that I’m supposed to be learning?”.

[10:52] Marly Q: That’s a great perspective. You know, one of the questions that I received from a friend when I posted on social media that I was going to get started with this podcast and I was asking for questions from my community was, how can we be more mindful in everyday life? And I think that’s always a great question, and you know, that you could provide a lot of insight on and maybe some specific tips, you know, but how can we be more mindful today, right now with what’s going through, which is also applicable to how we can be more mindful in everyday life?

[11:22] Jasmin: You know, have you heard this, Hoʻoponopono thing? This Hawaiian practice that there’s four questions, not questions statements, and I’ve used this in my practice historically but someone just like rebrought it up to me as like, from a different perspective that actually has been in interesting but this, I’ve always seen it as these four statements that you either say to yourself, you say to somebody else, you say to the universe that, to me feel softening, that they soften us and open us. And so, when you say these statements, it feels kind of like an awakening or an opening to receive and so, the four statements are these. “I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, and I love you”, right? So, even I’m saying right now and it’s just amazing how the feeling changes so much when you just say those statements, you can be saying it to yourself, you can say it to your inner child, you can say it to your whoever. I’ve recently started saying it to the divine, like, “I’m sorry that I’ve been ignoring you. Please forgive me. Thank you, I love you”, you know, like that, that there’s something that feels very profound about just repeating those four statements.

And so, that, I think is very poignant right now in this time to really just keep softening yourself and to repeat those statements to yourself. And also just start to just pay attention to how frequently you’re getting stuck in your head and whenever you do is coming up with some strategy to shift outward and into the present moment because I think so much of the chaos that’s happening is in our minds. I mean, granted, there’s a lot of chaos happening in reality, but a lot of us aren’t experiencing chaos in our reality. We’re actually just hanging out at home. You know, and so, what if we were to, every time we feel we’re in the chaos to just come back to the stillness of our home, of the moment, of– I love connecting with the sun, going outside, just feel the sun on my face, feel the wind on my face. Do whatever it takes to get your physical sensations connected to this present moment, touch something, listen to something, bring your attention to this present moment intentionally whenever it is that you catch yourself being caught up in your sensations or in your anxieties or your thoughts.

And then the last thing is always just ask yourself, “Where’s my breath right now?”, like, if that’s the only thing I tell my clients, if you only learn one thing from me, it’s just that, where is my breath right now? Because when we’re feeling calm, our breath is deep, and it goes all the way down. But when we’re not, and we’re stressing, we’re in our head and we’re in our thoughts and anxieties and feelings, all these things, it gets shorter in our chest. So, simply bringing your breath all the way down is the best drug there is.

[14:29] Marly Q: I have a shirt on right now that says, “Breathe”.

[14:30] Jasmin: I know, I love it.

[14:32] Marly Q: It’s like, if it’s one thing that I feel that I can control when I can’t control anything is just coming back in the awareness of my breath, and I can control how deep I breathe and how I feel it and I love how you mentioned connecting with the stillness of your home, right? And if you think of our home as not our physical home, of four walls, but our home, our inner home, our heart, our being, your breath is your anchor to that stillness in your home. For me, I mean, I grew up with asthma, for me, I am so connected to my breath. I’m so grateful, even when it’s shallow and anxious I, if I can connect with it, I’m aware of it. I’m like, “Oh, look at that you’re breathing that way that’s causing you stress and anxiety, let’s breathe deeper.”, and all of a sudden, I feel like I have a sense of control over something, even if the world around me feels so chaotic. So, I love that you mentioned that, it’s a great practice to being more mindful in everyday life.

And then you said, connecting with your senses, right? Using your senses of touch and smell and sights and sounds, to connect with this present moment. Because once we come inward and connect with those senses, then everything else just kind of fades away. Like, you begin to detach from whatever the chaos and the madness is outside of your home. So, those were really wonderful tips and the Hawaiian practice that you just shared, I’ll make sure I find it and you know, spell it correctly. So, because I don’t really know how to pronounce it either. It’s called Hoʻoponopono, I think, Hoʻoponopono, and the four steps there were, I’m sorry, or the four statements. I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you, you can direct those inward, you can direct those outward. It is a beautiful practice. So, thank you for sharing that.

[16:18] What are the benefits, the direct benefits, of counseling and empowering self-love and kindness practices in your life?

[16:27] Jasmin: Hmm. Good one. So, it’s interesting, in my practice, I integrate these four different modalities, right? I call it life therapy because it connects traditional psychotherapy and coaching with mindfulness and meditation. And to me what it is, is that our life is like a tree, right? And our tree has fruit. And so, sometimes our fruit is not growing or sometimes we have lemons and we want oranges and for whatever reason we often look at the branches or at the fruit themselves and try to change them as if that is going to work, right? But in order for there to be a change in the tree, you need to go to the roots, right? Or plant another tree. So, the idea is, is that what goes on inside of us directly affects everything in our lives, all of our circumstances, are not an accident, they’re directly correlated with what’s going on inside of us. And so, if we can deal with our roots, then it affects our fruits, right? And so, the idea of committing to that kind of practice is really doing the inner work. So, I like to think of our inner space, like a bedroom, right? And so, what happens is, if we have a messy room, we need to have a practice to figure out how to clean it out, right? So, that to me, is the psychotherapy, that’s doing a deeper dive. Where did these feelings come from? What happened in my past? What happened in these circumstances? What are these reoccurring things? What’s all these piles of dirty laundry stacked up in my room? How do I clear this out and clean out my inner space? Right?

And then a coaching practice is about how do I keep it clear, right? Because when our inner space is clear, then we can flow, then divine energy can flow through us, right? But until it’s clear, we’re all cluttered inside of us, and we’re just responding and reacting to all the clutter that’s inside of us. So, then the coaching practice and it’s coming up with, I like to call like, your inner workout, right? Is how do you set up your day in your life to be able to put things away? You know, my mom used to always say, “It’s easier to put your clothes in the dirty laundry now than to deal with a pile of it later.”, you know? Just those little moments and like this challenge that we’re doing, is those little moments every day to clean out that inner space so that It is an open vessel for that light and that love and that divine source to come through us. And then the mindfulness of meditation is learning how to be okay with the emptiness, right? I think that we have a big problem where we think, “Oh my god, I’m bored or something’s wrong, I need to something.”, and then like, all sudden, it just keeps getting filled in with other stuff. And so, the idea is, how do we let that space be clear and let that space be open and stop filling it up with other junk and be okay with the openness?

[19:31] Marly Q: What a wonderful opportunity to practice that now.

[19:33] Jasmin: Yeah.

[19:34] Marly Q; Right. We’re being given that gift, should we choose to see it that way.

[19:38] Jasmin: Yeah. I mean, I do think that life happens for us, right? So, that this is a shift, this opportunity, this awakening is to look within, to love more, to smile more, to connect more, to treat our kids as if this is our last moment, to eat this meal as if it’s our last meal, you know, to really come back to whether matters most in life; we’ve really fallen off.

[20:04] Marly Q: Yeah, I think we’ve really just disconnected or detached from that home base, if you will, and from the basics and this is all, you know, if you want to see the light in the darkness that’s, you know, currently going on, it’s that. We have given the gift of the opportunity of cleaning house in essence, right? It is spring cleaning time, if you will, but coming inward, and I think that, you know, seeking counseling or life therapy is a way of getting outside help to look inward, right? Because sometimes when we’re in our own head, in our own life, in our own mess, so to speak, it’s really difficult to see the label of the jar that you’re in, you need somebody outside of the jar to read to you, you know, the label and say, “Hey, you know, you’re standing, you’re not in quicksand right now. You’re not drowning. You’re not going to die. You’re actually in a jar of honey. It’s sweet. And it’s delicious.”. And you’re like, “Oh, okay, I’m not dying.”, right? So, I think that’s a very clear benefit of counseling or coaching from others is, having that outward perspective.

So, then, I think the benefits of empowering self-love and kindness, I mean, based our entire conversation are endless benefits of empowering self-love and kindness, not only does it directly impact you positively in your mind, in your emotions and your spirit, but there’s that endless ripple effect of how it empowers your family, your kids, your friends, your co-workers, the people that you, you know, interact with every day in the street, at the grocery store, and the whole world in this ripple effect, right? I would see that.

[21:39] Jasmin: Totally. And I think, you know, part of what I think is so valuable in this idea of being kind is understanding that being kind isn’t an avoidance of darkness. It’s not an avoidance of pain, it’s not suggesting that those things don’t exist and that they’re not happening. I think that’s really fundamental in this kind of work, is that we’re just learning how to treat them differently, and to not be stuck in it as if it’s the only path but I like to see it as like the glass can be both half full and half empty, and we’re not just focusing on it being half full, we’re focusing on being the glass, we’re focusing on being the space that allows both to exist and that we’re lovingly accepting both.

[22:31] Marly Q: Only from that perspective can we make, you know, enlightened or empowered choices, right? When we’re not a victim to one.

[22:37] Jasmin: For sure. And it is not easy, it takes lot of work, it’s a big commitment, but I haven’t been able to find another way that works any better.

[22:46] Marly Q: No, that’s why I love that you mentioned that because you know, sometimes all this talk about kindness and I mean, I’ve been called “a Polly Anna, you’re just so bright and cheerful, you must wake up and shoot, you know, fart rainbows and butterflies.”, and it’s like, “No, absolutely not”! You could ask my husband if you want some proof or my family, those closest to us. It is a practice, it is a daily, if not moment to moment practice, of being aware and relating to yourself, all of you, the light, the darkness, all of it, the yin, the yang, sun, the moon, all of it with more kindness and the time to be kind to ourselves, one another, and this world that we all share, it is our world, and if it’s one thing that we’re all currently going through right now, I think is the very clear realization that we’re all connected and we’re all in this together, which means we all got to get out of this together and rise up stronger, and I think the answer to that is through kindness, creating more time to be kind.

[22:48] Thank you so much for making that time again today with me Jasmin and with our PARKers listening. I know you’ve got your babies in the background, my baby too in the background, we’re going to get back to them. But I just– I’m just really so grateful, and I hope that you can come back for another episode. I think you have so much more to offer.

[24:09] Jasmin: Yeah, of course. To be continued, I love being connected with you. You are a wonderful, bright light in this world, and we all need more of that so, thank you so much for having this and doing this, and sharing.

[24:20] Marly Q: Big hugs– big hugs to you, we’ll talk soon.

[24:24] Outro:

So, there you have it PARKER. Practicing self-love and kindness allows us to create a calm and nurturing space within us, which we can always access and return home to, it just takes some awareness and practice.

How different might your life be if you knew how to manifest ABUNDANCE everywhere you went and believed that believed Every Day is a Good Day?

Our guest today lives, breathes and shares these messages with others every day which makes him a PARKer (someone who Performs Acts of Random Kindness).

Like us, he believes the Time to be Kind is ALWAYS NOW.

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TRANSCRIPTION:

Hey, hey! It’s Marly Q and welcome to Episode #6 with Sebastian Hart. Our guest today is truly one of a kind. He believes every day is a good day and lives, breathes & manifests abundance everywhere he goes! Sebastian Hart is the founder of Abundance & Things, and the creative director of Blind Color Hats, a unique brand of positive head wear, and the only kind of hats I’ll wear!

Not only is he a PARKer who loves Performing Acts of Random Kindness, but he believes the time to be kind is always NOW.

His favorite act of kindness is generously giving his time and positive energy, and he joins us today to do just that. So, sit back, relax and get ready to receive an abundance of positivity. [01:12] Marly Q: We are live! Thank you for making the Time to be Kind Sebastian. [01:16] Sebastian: Thank you for allowing me to be kind in your kind podcast. [01:21] Marly Q: Yes, yes! In these weird times that we’re living in … I always appreciate kindness and people that make the time to connect and engage in positive ways but more so now, than ever. I think that it’s very timely to have, not just this podcast but these conversations to try and spread some positivity, and some kindness and some abundance and there is nobody in the entire universe who I could think of that is better suited to spread abundance than you. [02:00] Sebastian: I’m here. I appreciate you for thinking of me that way. [02:05] Marly Q: Yeah, I want to kind of back things up and hear about, really a little bit of your story and how you even, you know, fell in love with this mindset, and this lifestyle that you live, breathe and share every single day of abundance. [02:22] Sebastian: Well, I believe that this is inside all of us. But I’ll tell you when it was sparked out of me, right. Because I believe every human has this spark inside of positivity and wanting to inspire it in a positive way and light and all those things. But somehow through the world and everything we hear and personalities around us, they just kind of mold us in a direction which we kind of, you know, we leave that pureness of a baby, of a kid, because if you look at all babies, they’re all pure, they’re all loving, they’re kind, they’re just beautiful. So, I was reminded. If I can pinpoint a point in my life, before that, I believe my life has always been abundant, you know, in the sense of love, I’ve always had a lot of love for my family. We lived a life where there was a lack of, it’s not like I’m rich, or my parents are rich, and you know, there was a time when we lived in Costa Rica, we all lived in a kitchen in the back with my sister, my mom and dad, but I was a kid. And in my head, it was always abundance, it was, I was just happy, I’m out in the street, doing my thing. My parents are going through a million things in their head, but I’m a kid, and I feel abundant. So, abundance has always been inside of me, and I’ve been able to just live in my head with that. But one day in college in ENC1102, a professor by the name of Warren Dittmar, and I will never forget his name, in fact, the day I have a son, I am throwing the name Warren in there somehow, in the middle, in the end or in the beginning. And this professor introduced to me the law of attraction, which I’m sure a lot of people have heard about, the law of attraction, think, manifest with your thoughts, whatever you think of, you attract. And this professor, it was the first time that I’ve ever heard this thought, this idea of think positive and positive things will happen. Maybe I’ve heard it before, but I never really applied it. And that day, ENC1102, Professor Dittmar in a class full of individuals showed us the movie The Secret, which is a popular film and I’m sure a lot of people have heard it, but it was the right time for me to hear it. That’s what it’s all about, it’s timing. If it’s not the right time, it’s not going to affect, but it was the right time. I was in a point in my life where I was going to school, just to– they’re just doing their own thing. So, I can tell at that moment that, this was just for me, it was just for me. And I remember leaving that day class, just high on life, super high, the highest I’ve ever been. I was singing, I was pumping gas on my way home, just singing, and happy. I had no idea what I was going to do next, I had no idea where I was going to take my life, but I did know one thing, that if I kept my mind in the right place, positive things will happen for the rest of my life. And ever since that moment, I just think of solutions, never a problem. I started changing words. For example, negative words like, negative phrases, I just, I became obsessed with just changing them, like expressions like, “Oh, that’s so sick.”, that kids like to say, I was like, “I’ll never say that again.”, that’s unhealthy. So, little things like that, that people will look at me is like, “What is that?”. In my head, it has a big effect and in my head is where I live, and that’s all that matters. So, in my head, I started changing all those things, and little by little, positive people just kept coming into my life and people who weren’t about that lifestyle, started leaving. And that was the organic process of that. Basically, years later, this is where I am today, just continue to focus on that, change negative tones, apply positive ones, and abundance. That’s what it is. [06:27] Marly Q: And it is a practice, right? It’s not like it just, it just happened overnight. It’s a practice. It’s been years. [06:35] Sebastian: It’s something you need to practice, something you need to exercise, it’s not just– it was a switch, but it was– [06:42] Marly Q: It was a spark. [06:43] Sebastian: It was a spark. But there was definitely an application from my part, I couldn’t just watch the video and continue to allow the lifestyle I was living. I had to call my friends out, I had to call my family members out, anything negative, anything and everything, gone. [07:01] Marly Q: I love it. I love that. I think it’s so important because many people, and I’m sure many people listening to this, have seen the secret and have heard about the law of attraction and understand, you know, positive thinking and, the manifestation process, and they also don’t realize that it’s not just in our minds, right? That there also has to be a place in our hearts where we are believing in the power of our positive thoughts, and there’s a place in our hands and in our body, in our actual actions, in our words and in our deeds, right? That have to be aligned. [07:35] Sebastian: Everything. [07:35] Marly Q: And that takes practice in order for it to cement and become a lifestyle and become, not something that we just talk about or share on social media and like some kind of fad, but genuinely live and breathe this every single day. And you are most definitely somebody that from the very moment that we met, I can tell that this was who you were, this was who you showed up in the world as, a PARKer, that I would call PARKer, somebody that not just Performs Acts of Random Kindness, but also does that for themselves in their own life. [08:16] Sebastian: I appreciate that. And that’s very well said, exactly how you said it. You not only have to do it for the world, but most important for yourself, you have to apply that positive energy to yourself. [08:28] Marly Q: So, on that note, I know that you are a believer that we live in abundance, we live in the age of abundance, and that the world is on our side, and that we’re always at the right place at the right time. And in these times, this current time in 2020, as we are experiencing this massive kind of transition, and very difficult times for many, many people. [09:00] Sebastian: It’s just a weird time. [09:01] Marly Q: Weird, right? How are you staying positive in these days? Is anything– are you applying any kind of different practices? [09:08] Sebastian: No different than any other time in my life, you know? Times are weird all the time. It just happens to be that they’re weirdest right now where we’re living in, but on planet Earth, there’s weird things happening all the time. And just because now we’re being affected doesn’t mean that weird times weren’t happening before. But you know, if you look at social media, for example, what’s happening in Italy, it’s beautiful to see the people who are quarantined, just singing to each other and playing music to each other. So, you can find light in that. Just find light in things, find light in staying at home and connecting with your family, find light in connecting with yourself, you know. If you are the person who says, “Oh, I don’t have time to work out.”, well, here’s your time, work out. [09:56] Marly Q: “I’ve been meaning to start this new project that I don’t have time for.”, now you’ve got the time. [10:01] Sebastian: Everybody has time right now. And there’s really nothing different that I’m doing now, it’s just focusing on the solution. I know it’s going to be all right, and I know for a fact that we as a nation are going to be stronger than ever after this. So, that’s just what it is, it’s unfortunate that we’re going through this, I wish we weren’t. But there’s also cells in my body who believe everything happened for a reason, and that’s something that I ingrained in myself. When something good happens, when something bad happens, everything happens for a reason, and you can’t just dismiss that thought when something bad is happening. You have to apply and understand that the universe loves you and is on your side, and whatever is happening, it’s supposed to happen. [10:47] Marly Q: And there’s some light in it, and it’s our job to find that light, and if we can’t find that light easily, we could always be that light, because we all have that within us, which I just I love that message, Sebastian, thank you. I think that many people need to hear it. It’s really easy to get wrapped up in, you know, in the madness of all of this in the, you know, in the negativity of all of it, and it’s just messages like the one that you’re sharing that remind us, there’s light in every situation, that we may not see it right away, but we can look for it, we can be that light, we can make the best out of any time that’s going on. [11:32] Sebastian: 100%. [11:32] Marly Q: And even though we don’t understand, you know, the consequences of what is going on in the world right now, just having like the belief and the trust that the universe is always on your side and universe is kind and loving, and somehow this is something that’s going to bring us together and be good. [11:56] Sebastian: Yeah, that’s what it is, we have to think of the solutions and the positive things. Because we can sit here and be like, “Oh my god, everything’s going bad. I’m going to have to pay rent at the end of the month but, you know, we can’t work.”, and listen, just relax. Just relax. Everybody’s going through it, it’s not just you. This situation specific, it’s very easy to actually be calm because it’s not just a personal thing, it’s the world. So, we are all going through this, it’s not one person. [12:26] Marly Q: And isn’t it interesting too to notice what you just said right now? Just to harp on that, is how once we can create just a little bit of space and distance from what we are individually going through and really think about the collective, the global sense of humanity as one mankind, we realize that even in a situation like this, we’re more connected than ever, right? So, when the social media and the news and the government is telling us about social distancing, you know, that phrase doesn’t really sit well with me because we’re really talking more about physical distancing so that we don’t catch this thing. But it’s more about social solidarity and social connection more than ever, right? [13:15] Sebastian: Absolutely. Especially in the age of abundance and the age of social media, which I believe it’s the age of abundance and the age of social media, it’s one thing, the fact that we are able to just grab the phone and I am connected to Italy right now. I can send a message to somebody in Italy and tell them, “Hey, it’s cool, it’s alright, we’re going to be okay.”, that’s the age of abundance. And just being a spark, you know, being kind to somebody can just change their entire day, and that’s a beautiful thing that we can just do, for free. It’s free. [13:52] Marly Q: Exactly. We have the opportunity to be doing this interview right now, and that is abundant. And one of the things that you, I know that abundance is your favorite word, but a phrase that I think maybe is your favorite phrase because I hear you say it all the time, and I love it. And sometimes I find myself saying it, and I’m like, “Ah!”, and I think of you because it’s not my phrase, it’s your phrase, but I love how you just share it every day for all of us that are lucky enough to be friends with you or to follow you on social media, “Good Day, Every Day.”. [14:25] Sebastian: Good Day, Every Day. That’s our motto, that’s the Blind Color Hats motto. You know, it’s a company which I work with, I am the creative director. Marcus James created a company it’s called Blind Color Hats, and I met Marcus James through social media, and the message of his company was, “Good Day, Every Day.”. And he literally reached out to me on Instagram and he said, “You need to wear this hat. You are this message, like, I need to send you a hat.”. And when he sent me that hat, I looked at the hat, I read the message and the message pretty much summed it up for me. It’s everything we just talked about, the world being positive, think of solutions. If you focus and you believe every day is good day, it’s going to be alright because if you get the opportunity to wake up the next day and try it again, do it again, yesterday was a good day, which means every day is a good day. And it’s true, my favorite phrase besides– [15:31] Marly Q: Abundance! [15:32] Sebasian: My favorite word, my favorite phrase is Good Day, Every Day. It’s just what it is, it’s a Good Day Every Day, you can find the good in any day, and you can find the good in today. [15:44] Marly Q: Thank you. I did want to touch on that, and I do really want to emphasize that because that does sum it up. And it’s something that we can all choose to believe, and we can all choose to practice every day, and you are just such a shining example of that. And I appreciate you again, I have to– I’ll say it again and again, we’ve known each other for a few years now and I think I express just how much I value and honor, and celebrate your attitude, your positivity, and how you don’t just keep that to yourself, you’re so incredibly generous to share that with others every single day. And, you know, maybe there’s some people that are like, annoyed by the fact that you say, “Good Day, Every Day”, and they feel like they’re having a bad day, and you say, “Good day, every day”, anyway, because it is, right? [16:43] Sebastian: Yeah. And you’re right. The choice, it’s exactly what you said, it’s a choice. You choose to say it, you choose to believe it, you can choose to say, “My life sucks.”, and this would probably be the only time I actually say those words back to back because my life doesn’t suck. I will never say that because I don’t believe it. No life sucks. All life is great. Life is beautiful. And I do choose to say, “Good day, every day”, because I can. And I will continue to say, “Good day, every day”, till forever and ever and I will make sure that I create enough content in this world that my grandkids’ grandkids will just move around, walking and saying, “Good day, every day, hey”. [17:24] Marly Q: I love that. I absolutely love that. I think the world needs that. And I hope that all those listening, adopt that phrase because you’ll give it to them generously, right? [17:37] Sebastian: For free. It’s free 99. [17:39] Marly Q: Free 99! How can people connect with you & your awesome positive, uplifting content? Where can people find you? [17:49] Sebastian: Well, social media is a great place to start. I mean, you can follow me @Bluehart and you can go down the rabbit hole from there. We have different accounts for different things. You can go down the YouTube rabbit hole, I have like six YouTube accounts, the blind color channel, you have the blue heart channel, we create content for different companies all around and we always apply our energy into everything we work for. So, any company we work for, it’s not just for money, I only take on projects that apply with what I’m working on. So, let’s say if a violence company wants to hire me and my services to create content for something negative and they want to pay me good amount of money, I can’t do it. I can’t do it. I can only work with things that go in my life and I can apply my energy to. So, I need everybody do the same, don’t just work for money, work for for energy, to receive that energy and give energy and that’s how I maintain this energy flow. [18:55] Marly Q: Absolutely. What a great tip. What a great strategy also, it’s a really valuable life philosophy, but also business practice. And I know, I feel, you know, my husband and I feel incredibly fortunate to have connected with you. Again, not just for our wonderful, you know, relationship and friendship, but also from a business relationship. Because once we shared with you about our PARK Project and our 5K PARK Fest and what we were working on, and our vision and our mission for what we’re creating, you immediately opened up and said, “Yes, I’m in.”, because of exactly what you’re sharing. It was aligned with, who you are, what you put out into the world, and we were, you know, amazingly blessed to receive your energy and I think that PARK Project was also an outlet to give you some energy that’s aligned with what you share every day. [19:49] Sebastian: Absolutely. It was a no brainer when you told me about PARK Project. I was I wish I could have done more at the time. I mean, that was, when we did that first festival, it was a while ago. [20:01] Marly Q: 5 years ago. [20:01] Sebastian: I’m looking forward to you like, kick starting another one because I really enjoyed that festival and I know that I’m in a place where I can definitely give a lot more back in wage to that festival, but perform acts of random kindness goes hand in hand with my lifestyle, it’s a Good Day Every Day and to have a good day, you must perform acts of kindness, not only to people but to yourself. And I love PARK Project, I’m looking at the trophy you guys gave me in that festival and it’s a constant reminder of what great people do out here and we must continue to attract that. [20:38] Marly Q: Thank you so much. I feel that we definitely attracted each other’s energy to create great things and it’s just the beginning. You know, even seeing that sign behind you, you know, we’re doing this interview virtually via zoom and seeing that dance sign behind you just brings back so many awesome memories and wonderful images in my mind and definitely the desire and the spark is there to bring our 5K Park fest back. So, this podcast is my virtual way of continuing to spread this message and having, in essence, online, virtual events until we’re able to to bring these babies back because they must exist. [21:18] Sebastian: They must exist. [21:21] Marly Q: Awesome. Well with that, Sebastian, I want to thank you so much, again for making the time to be kind. I hope that this isn’t our first and only interview. I hope that there are many more if you’re willing to come back. [21:33] Sebastian: Absolutely. We must do this, and once the world stops being a little weird, we’d come back and do it live with some cameras and. [21:41] Marly Q: Yes, we have our in-home studio and there will be no social distancing laws, keeping us from hugs and high fives. [21:51] Sebastian: We can do a hug like this. [virtual hug] [21:56] Marly Q: Thank you so much. We’ll talk real soon my friend. [21:59] Sebastian: My pleasure. Thank you for the energy you put out into the world and all the great things you create, everything you said about me, I say about you and I am grateful to have you as a friend, for you coming into my life, your beautiful little ones that I’m sure you want to create great positive things in this world. So, I am excited, and I’ll continue to inspire, keep inspiring people to succeed, which is an acronym, which I know you’re fond of acronyms, and keep doing what you’re doing my friend. [22:28] Marly Q: I love that acronym for KIDS. I will make sure to put that in our show notes, and I have totally added that to my list of favorite acronyms. Keep Inspiring Dreaming Succeeding. Go KIDS! [22:43] Outro

I sure hope you felt a spark of abundant positivity after listening to this episode. Sebastian encourages us to find the light in all that you see and focus on the positive side of things because it’s a Good Day, Every Day. To learn more, you can visit blindcolorhats.com and follow him on Instagram @Bluehart Leave a comment on his latest posts using #wepark to let him know you’re also a PARKer and part of my Kind Qrew. And if you haven’t joined yet, head on over to www.marlyQ.com/kindQrew We’re waiting for you!